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Parent Emeritus
Always At Their Mercy - Nothing is Black and White
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<blockquote data-quote="Albatross" data-source="post: 750787" data-attributes="member: 17720"><p>I'm sorry, Chickpea. I don't understand how hard it is, but I do have friends with grandchildren and I've seen their joy, and I realize they are in a whole different situation from what we would face, if our son fathered a child. I'm so grateful he hasn't (yet, that I know of), because I know we would face many of the issues you are facing.</p><p></p><p>Perhaps your daughter is seeking some of the power and/or respect that comes with her role as mother, even though she isn't doing any of the hard lifting that comes with parenting. Our culture honors mothers (at least most of us do, most of the time...not so much around here HAHA). Maybe she expects some of that as her due, or hopes to somehow retain it.</p><p></p><p>In many ways you ARE at her mercy, because she IS holding you hostage when she has the baby in her arms. I don't know how you can change that dynamic, when she is being mean and cold and rude and unreasonable.</p><p></p><p>Lord knows you are doing enough already and this shouldn't fall on you and your husband too...but do YOU think there are ways to change the dynamic?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Albatross, post: 750787, member: 17720"] I'm sorry, Chickpea. I don't understand how hard it is, but I do have friends with grandchildren and I've seen their joy, and I realize they are in a whole different situation from what we would face, if our son fathered a child. I'm so grateful he hasn't (yet, that I know of), because I know we would face many of the issues you are facing. Perhaps your daughter is seeking some of the power and/or respect that comes with her role as mother, even though she isn't doing any of the hard lifting that comes with parenting. Our culture honors mothers (at least most of us do, most of the time...not so much around here HAHA). Maybe she expects some of that as her due, or hopes to somehow retain it. In many ways you ARE at her mercy, because she IS holding you hostage when she has the baby in her arms. I don't know how you can change that dynamic, when she is being mean and cold and rude and unreasonable. Lord knows you are doing enough already and this shouldn't fall on you and your husband too...but do YOU think there are ways to change the dynamic? [/QUOTE]
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Always At Their Mercy - Nothing is Black and White
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