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Parent Emeritus
Always At Their Mercy - Nothing is Black and White
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<blockquote data-quote="ChickPea" data-source="post: 750808" data-attributes="member: 24089"><p>Boy did you hit the nail on the head!</p><p>Yes, this has been her "role" for years.</p><p></p><p>It's like I have my files organized and she keeps coming in and hiding them, throwing them around, discombobulating them so I can't find them. Obfuscating. I keep putting them back, she keeps messing them up. I can't gain footing. That's how I feel at least.</p><p></p><p>In the last couple of years we had gotten <em>much</em> better, and to a place where I felt like we were digging out of years of turmoil. But then the grandchild has come into play and introduced another element. I guess that's what brought me back here. Setting boundaries for myself seems normal (now), but aligning them with how and when she sees her child is my difficulty.</p><p></p><p>I meet with a lawyer next week. I feel like we need mediation, but I can't imagine anyone that would be experienced enough to handle it.</p><p></p><p>Thanks for the food for thought all. The two lawyers that I've talked to both told us we are in limbo, and it would probably be that way for a couple years. They just don't understand (or know) the full situation. It's not that simple.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="ChickPea, post: 750808, member: 24089"] Boy did you hit the nail on the head! Yes, this has been her "role" for years. It's like I have my files organized and she keeps coming in and hiding them, throwing them around, discombobulating them so I can't find them. Obfuscating. I keep putting them back, she keeps messing them up. I can't gain footing. That's how I feel at least. In the last couple of years we had gotten [I]much[/I] better, and to a place where I felt like we were digging out of years of turmoil. But then the grandchild has come into play and introduced another element. I guess that's what brought me back here. Setting boundaries for myself seems normal (now), but aligning them with how and when she sees her child is my difficulty. I meet with a lawyer next week. I feel like we need mediation, but I can't imagine anyone that would be experienced enough to handle it. Thanks for the food for thought all. The two lawyers that I've talked to both told us we are in limbo, and it would probably be that way for a couple years. They just don't understand (or know) the full situation. It's not that simple. [/QUOTE]
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Always At Their Mercy - Nothing is Black and White
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