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Parent Emeritus
Always At Their Mercy - Nothing is Black and White
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<blockquote data-quote="ChickPea" data-source="post: 750826" data-attributes="member: 24089"><p>Ack. Kind of teary here. I don't know why it is so hard to kind of take your own advice (as someone said I should look at what I'd tell a friend in the same situation), but... alas it is. <strong>Thank you all for being candid, thoughtful, and supportive. </strong></p><p></p><p>We have been keeping track of things, thank goodness. I write short notes in my journal, just to make sure I can keep things straight with the chaos. Fantastic recommendation. </p><p></p><p>Yesterday we met her on neutral grounds and talked and I did explain to her that this wasn't working for me, that we could turn him over to her (and she would likely be found unfit), or we could continue supporting her in keeping him safe and allowing her the time she needed to get her stuff together. I told her that I need to be able to work a few hours substituting this week, and I don't need her to question it or stop by or stir things up for me. </p><p></p><p>She knows it is not reasonable to think that she could fully care for him right now.</p><p></p><p>She responded with "I want to see my child, I don't care about you." But today she didn't come by. Today was OK. We will see how the rest of the week goes. </p><p></p><p>I need some progress from her, some normalcy in my own life. If she violates this request (to allow me to call some shots and make my own decisions), I do need to come back with something. Not sure what that will be right now.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>Excellent point. Yes, this is very true. I need to explain this to her again and again. She thinks we're against her and trusts no one. I think that's the alcohol/pot/coke talking.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="ChickPea, post: 750826, member: 24089"] Ack. Kind of teary here. I don't know why it is so hard to kind of take your own advice (as someone said I should look at what I'd tell a friend in the same situation), but... alas it is. [B]Thank you all for being candid, thoughtful, and supportive. [/B] We have been keeping track of things, thank goodness. I write short notes in my journal, just to make sure I can keep things straight with the chaos. Fantastic recommendation. Yesterday we met her on neutral grounds and talked and I did explain to her that this wasn't working for me, that we could turn him over to her (and she would likely be found unfit), or we could continue supporting her in keeping him safe and allowing her the time she needed to get her stuff together. I told her that I need to be able to work a few hours substituting this week, and I don't need her to question it or stop by or stir things up for me. She knows it is not reasonable to think that she could fully care for him right now. She responded with "I want to see my child, I don't care about you." But today she didn't come by. Today was OK. We will see how the rest of the week goes. I need some progress from her, some normalcy in my own life. If she violates this request (to allow me to call some shots and make my own decisions), I do need to come back with something. Not sure what that will be right now. Excellent point. Yes, this is very true. I need to explain this to her again and again. She thinks we're against her and trusts no one. I think that's the alcohol/pot/coke talking. [/QUOTE]
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Always At Their Mercy - Nothing is Black and White
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