Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Always At Their Mercy - Nothing is Black and White
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="JayPee" data-source="post: 750831" data-attributes="member: 23405"><p>CP..</p><p>I don't know a lot about this matter but maybe when meeting with the lawyers there could be some boundaries set up for your mental health and well being. Could it be possible that it is at least stipulated that when your daughter meets up with her son that it is with a "third party" and not in your home and scheduled times? From my point of view that is part of what violates your "space". You are not only dealing with whatever personality/mood/irritation she is feeling when she pops in but you're also dealing with her taking charge of your home-your boundaries. If she was to meet with a third party it would remove you from whatever she is going through that day and also as mentioned if not in your home also disconnects you further for your own healing and well-being. It would allow you to detach a bit more. Detachment is not necessarily a boundary to keep others out but rather it allows "us" to realize what is acceptable and unacceptable behavior for us. </p><p></p><p>I'm wondering if maybe a lot of what your daughter exhibits is similar to what I know an alcoholic exhibits (even when they get sober). There's a lot of guilt, anger and grief. Anger can show it's ugly face in a lot of different ways. It could likely be when your daughter is like this that she is really grieving for herself (similar to how most of us have to grieve the loss of what we hoped would have been with our Adult Children who are addicted, mentally ill and/or both) and she's dissapointed in herself but tries to divert her feelings by creating chaos ..similar to the alcoholic with her bad mood, bad temper etc.</p><p></p><p>I'm not sure if this helps but I'll pray some kind of healthy boundaries can be set up for you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="JayPee, post: 750831, member: 23405"] CP.. I don't know a lot about this matter but maybe when meeting with the lawyers there could be some boundaries set up for your mental health and well being. Could it be possible that it is at least stipulated that when your daughter meets up with her son that it is with a "third party" and not in your home and scheduled times? From my point of view that is part of what violates your "space". You are not only dealing with whatever personality/mood/irritation she is feeling when she pops in but you're also dealing with her taking charge of your home-your boundaries. If she was to meet with a third party it would remove you from whatever she is going through that day and also as mentioned if not in your home also disconnects you further for your own healing and well-being. It would allow you to detach a bit more. Detachment is not necessarily a boundary to keep others out but rather it allows "us" to realize what is acceptable and unacceptable behavior for us. I'm wondering if maybe a lot of what your daughter exhibits is similar to what I know an alcoholic exhibits (even when they get sober). There's a lot of guilt, anger and grief. Anger can show it's ugly face in a lot of different ways. It could likely be when your daughter is like this that she is really grieving for herself (similar to how most of us have to grieve the loss of what we hoped would have been with our Adult Children who are addicted, mentally ill and/or both) and she's dissapointed in herself but tries to divert her feelings by creating chaos ..similar to the alcoholic with her bad mood, bad temper etc. I'm not sure if this helps but I'll pray some kind of healthy boundaries can be set up for you. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Always At Their Mercy - Nothing is Black and White
Top