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This sounds suspiciously like J has "got something" on your son, Lil. Something is giving J this power over your son and your son needs to figure out what it is. This goes beyond "mooching" or J knowing your son is a "soft touch". There's a lot more to this story than what your son is telling you, and the reluctance to involve the authorities indicates to me that there may be illegal activities involved, or at least something that your son would find earth-shatteringly humiliating/embarassing that J knows about/has threatened to make public, ie: blackmail.