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The Watercooler
and the truth shall set you free?
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<blockquote data-quote="DDD" data-source="post: 413088" data-attributes="member: 35"><p>I'm sure there is relief in knowing that he has had this habit during the years you were dating and not just the eight months that you have been married. Now you know that you have not been imaging scenarios and feeling betrayed without reason.</p><p>Obviously your husband has issues that need to be resolved. Is he still willing to go to therapy to work through his problems, your problems and the problems in the marriage? If so I really believe you both should try now the cloud of doubt has been lifted and he is beginning to see how damaging it has been.</p><p> </p><p>I am close to a few women who discovered ongoing infidelities and were absolutely heartbroken. After the initial shock they were able to unite in counseling and actually save their family unit. Obviously I know more who decided to face the world alone. Some were happy with their decisions and others felt that after the dust settled that they wished they had given it one more try, mainly for the sake of the children.</p><p> </p><p>Take some time and analyze your choices. Make a list of his strong points as well as his problem. Make a list for you. Make a list for each of your chldren. If for no other reason than we are living in grave times in 2011 and 2012 is not projected to be much improved I fear the results of losing your home, losing your car, losing the very important health insurance protections for your children and yourself. There are very few supports for single Moms today and the cuts in benefits and in particularly the mental health community. Even in l970 it was almost impossible to find someone to care for my children while I worked. Having a difficult child made it scarey for the children and for me....and I did have backup support from my family.</p><p> </p><p>Whatever you decide you have the support of your cyber family. We are on your team and hope for the best. Hugs DDD</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DDD, post: 413088, member: 35"] I'm sure there is relief in knowing that he has had this habit during the years you were dating and not just the eight months that you have been married. Now you know that you have not been imaging scenarios and feeling betrayed without reason. Obviously your husband has issues that need to be resolved. Is he still willing to go to therapy to work through his problems, your problems and the problems in the marriage? If so I really believe you both should try now the cloud of doubt has been lifted and he is beginning to see how damaging it has been. I am close to a few women who discovered ongoing infidelities and were absolutely heartbroken. After the initial shock they were able to unite in counseling and actually save their family unit. Obviously I know more who decided to face the world alone. Some were happy with their decisions and others felt that after the dust settled that they wished they had given it one more try, mainly for the sake of the children. Take some time and analyze your choices. Make a list of his strong points as well as his problem. Make a list for you. Make a list for each of your chldren. If for no other reason than we are living in grave times in 2011 and 2012 is not projected to be much improved I fear the results of losing your home, losing your car, losing the very important health insurance protections for your children and yourself. There are very few supports for single Moms today and the cuts in benefits and in particularly the mental health community. Even in l970 it was almost impossible to find someone to care for my children while I worked. Having a difficult child made it scarey for the children and for me....and I did have backup support from my family. Whatever you decide you have the support of your cyber family. We are on your team and hope for the best. Hugs DDD [/QUOTE]
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