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General Parenting
another inconsequential argument with difficult child...
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<blockquote data-quote="ksm" data-source="post: 530818" data-attributes="member: 12511"><p>Trying to get the truth out of a difficult child is impossible! Over the dumbest things. She wanted to be woken up at 6:30 to shower. She is sharing a room with little easy child, so instead of an alarm, I quietly wake her up so easy child can sleep 30 more minutes. I notice a towel stuffed under the door when I get ready to open it. After her shower, I ask, why the towel? I get some bull about the light coming thru bothers her and keeps her awake. Remind her that she was the last one up and all the lights were off when she went to bed. Then she back pedals and says, well, when you get up the hallway light shines under the door and bothers her. I remind her we don't turn on the hallway light, as we can get from our door to the bathroom just fine with out turning on a light. She argues next that the light from the bathroom is what she is blocking out. I ask her what was she doing that she didn't want us to know last night? NOTHING! Fast forward 10 mionutes... I go to wake up little sis... and there, above her bunkbed, on the ceiling is a piece of paper, taped there by difficult child, telling her to please keep her side of the bedroom cleaner!!! </p><p></p><p>Aarrgghhh! I knew she had been up to something but just wouldn't say it! To be perfectly honest, difficult child's side is cleaner than easy child's which is not the norm. BUT... difficult child lost $20 last week for some stupid discount cards the school has them sell for a fund raiser. She walked two houses down, sold our neighbor two cards, put the $20 in her back pocket and walked home. In 5 minutes she lad lost the $20! We walked the neighborhood, we scoured the house. To difficult child's benefit, she said she would pay the $20 out of her own funds she is saving for an iPod. Great! No meltdown!! So I made a deal with her... clean her part of the room and keep it clean for a week and I'd pay the missing $20. Usually you can't walk thru her side of the room. It is a large room, and to give the girls some separateness.... we put the loft bunkbed on easy child's side - about 3 feet from the wall. the bottom bunk in on the opposite wall. So difficult child has about 12 more feet than easy child. We hang a quilt off the side of the loft bunk to make a "privacy screen". I told difficult child it wasn't fair that she is trying to tell easy child to keep her little sliver of space clean, when the only reason difficult child is keeping hers clean is the $20. And that if it was that important to her to stay up and night, making a poster to tape abover her sleeping sisters head, then maybe she should share the $20, as easy child isn't getting paid extra!!</p><p></p><p>Oh, on missing money... difficult child got a $50 Target giftcard from other grandparents for Christmas. I had her put it up... but she kept taking it out and carrying it around. Now that is missing too! So frustrating!</p><p></p><p>I guess what is so frustrating is that last night... we had major attitude regarding homework. When she came home, I asked if she had homework. She said "a little". Three hours later, after supper, we ask her to work on it. Meltdown, because she always likes to take a walk or do physical activity after a meal...(that is what she said...) Pushed for her to do it. Meltdown... she can't do it because she says she forgot to find out what the homework was in English. Pushed for her to at least to sit down and write on a piece of paper a plan for tomorrow... to think about her day, her classes... and write stuff down and start the next school day more organized... and tomorrow to add to it if necessary. Well, before starting that... meltdown. Then she got her binder and got a piece of paper and found a piece of homework for literature class! Imagine that. So she did that. Or at least she said she did it. Could have been doodling for all I know.</p><p></p><p>She always forgets!! and has some excuse why she forgot! Oh well... a new day. I wonder what lies ahead today? KSM</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="ksm, post: 530818, member: 12511"] Trying to get the truth out of a difficult child is impossible! Over the dumbest things. She wanted to be woken up at 6:30 to shower. She is sharing a room with little easy child, so instead of an alarm, I quietly wake her up so easy child can sleep 30 more minutes. I notice a towel stuffed under the door when I get ready to open it. After her shower, I ask, why the towel? I get some bull about the light coming thru bothers her and keeps her awake. Remind her that she was the last one up and all the lights were off when she went to bed. Then she back pedals and says, well, when you get up the hallway light shines under the door and bothers her. I remind her we don't turn on the hallway light, as we can get from our door to the bathroom just fine with out turning on a light. She argues next that the light from the bathroom is what she is blocking out. I ask her what was she doing that she didn't want us to know last night? NOTHING! Fast forward 10 mionutes... I go to wake up little sis... and there, above her bunkbed, on the ceiling is a piece of paper, taped there by difficult child, telling her to please keep her side of the bedroom cleaner!!! Aarrgghhh! I knew she had been up to something but just wouldn't say it! To be perfectly honest, difficult child's side is cleaner than easy child's which is not the norm. BUT... difficult child lost $20 last week for some stupid discount cards the school has them sell for a fund raiser. She walked two houses down, sold our neighbor two cards, put the $20 in her back pocket and walked home. In 5 minutes she lad lost the $20! We walked the neighborhood, we scoured the house. To difficult child's benefit, she said she would pay the $20 out of her own funds she is saving for an iPod. Great! No meltdown!! So I made a deal with her... clean her part of the room and keep it clean for a week and I'd pay the missing $20. Usually you can't walk thru her side of the room. It is a large room, and to give the girls some separateness.... we put the loft bunkbed on easy child's side - about 3 feet from the wall. the bottom bunk in on the opposite wall. So difficult child has about 12 more feet than easy child. We hang a quilt off the side of the loft bunk to make a "privacy screen". I told difficult child it wasn't fair that she is trying to tell easy child to keep her little sliver of space clean, when the only reason difficult child is keeping hers clean is the $20. And that if it was that important to her to stay up and night, making a poster to tape abover her sleeping sisters head, then maybe she should share the $20, as easy child isn't getting paid extra!! Oh, on missing money... difficult child got a $50 Target giftcard from other grandparents for Christmas. I had her put it up... but she kept taking it out and carrying it around. Now that is missing too! So frustrating! I guess what is so frustrating is that last night... we had major attitude regarding homework. When she came home, I asked if she had homework. She said "a little". Three hours later, after supper, we ask her to work on it. Meltdown, because she always likes to take a walk or do physical activity after a meal...(that is what she said...) Pushed for her to do it. Meltdown... she can't do it because she says she forgot to find out what the homework was in English. Pushed for her to at least to sit down and write on a piece of paper a plan for tomorrow... to think about her day, her classes... and write stuff down and start the next school day more organized... and tomorrow to add to it if necessary. Well, before starting that... meltdown. Then she got her binder and got a piece of paper and found a piece of homework for literature class! Imagine that. So she did that. Or at least she said she did it. Could have been doodling for all I know. She always forgets!! and has some excuse why she forgot! Oh well... a new day. I wonder what lies ahead today? KSM [/QUOTE]
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