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<blockquote data-quote="Childofmine" data-source="post: 669208" data-attributes="member: 17542"><p>Lil, I so understand what you wrote below. </p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>During the year before Difficult Child went to jail and got out this last time, I would open Facebook and I could see if he had been on there or not within the past 12 hours or so.</p><p></p><p>That's all I wanted to know. </p><p></p><p>Nothing else. Just that he was alive. </p><p></p><p>Every time he called through an unknown number, whenever any unknown number would pop up, I would clench up.</p><p></p><p>I knew it would be more of the same. </p><p></p><p>But...if I didn't know he was alive every few days, I would start to awfulize.</p><p></p><p>This is so hard.</p><p></p><p>They taught us this. Their behavior and their actions taught us to respond this way. It is truly awful.</p><p></p><p>But I will also say this: as we progress in our recovery from enabling (and you are definitely making tremendous progress!!!!), we create some space for something new to happen.</p><p></p><p>You are creating that space right now. </p><p></p><p>I am praying for continued strength, courage and peace for you, and for him to start to see his life clearly. </p><p></p><p>Hang in there.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Childofmine, post: 669208, member: 17542"] Lil, I so understand what you wrote below. During the year before Difficult Child went to jail and got out this last time, I would open Facebook and I could see if he had been on there or not within the past 12 hours or so. That's all I wanted to know. Nothing else. Just that he was alive. Every time he called through an unknown number, whenever any unknown number would pop up, I would clench up. I knew it would be more of the same. But...if I didn't know he was alive every few days, I would start to awfulize. This is so hard. They taught us this. Their behavior and their actions taught us to respond this way. It is truly awful. But I will also say this: as we progress in our recovery from enabling (and you are definitely making tremendous progress!!!!), we create some space for something new to happen. You are creating that space right now. I am praying for continued strength, courage and peace for you, and for him to start to see his life clearly. Hang in there. [/QUOTE]
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