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At My Witt's End
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 756641" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>I will speak from only what I believe. I think that there are people with narcissistic personality disorder, and I think that there are many more people with narcissistic traits, and still many more with "healthy narcissism" because some self-regard is a good thing. But I think also that what looks like narcissism can arise from drug use and other addictive behavior, and I think it can arise from extreme self-indulgence. I don't think narcissism in the clinical, diagnosed sense is helped by medication as it is a personality disorder. I also want to add that narcissism is "popular" at this point in time. People believe that they can diagnose their mothers and their siblings, on the basis of what their relationships feel like. </p><p></p><p>I think our children learn from us how to treat us. Unfortunately, when we're timid, give up our power, are easily manipulated, give in, are reactive, cry, beg, isolate, cater, we reinforce behaviors in them that seem narcissistic. We elevate them in importance. Give them the sense that they are the center of the world. Take away their ability to develop empathy and dis-incentivize compassion on their part, and reward self-indulgence on their part. I am not mother-bashing here, although I was guilty of all of these behaviors with respect to my own child. </p><p></p><p>What I am saying here is that no one person in a family can be seen in isolation apart from the others. I am part of the problem. I need to look at myself.</p><p>I did this for a very long time with my son and with M. And then things happened with respect to each of them, and I ended up alone in my house. And little by little it became glorious. I have spent 3 days washing windows and blinds. What a blessing.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 756641, member: 18958"] I will speak from only what I believe. I think that there are people with narcissistic personality disorder, and I think that there are many more people with narcissistic traits, and still many more with "healthy narcissism" because some self-regard is a good thing. But I think also that what looks like narcissism can arise from drug use and other addictive behavior, and I think it can arise from extreme self-indulgence. I don't think narcissism in the clinical, diagnosed sense is helped by medication as it is a personality disorder. I also want to add that narcissism is "popular" at this point in time. People believe that they can diagnose their mothers and their siblings, on the basis of what their relationships feel like. I think our children learn from us how to treat us. Unfortunately, when we're timid, give up our power, are easily manipulated, give in, are reactive, cry, beg, isolate, cater, we reinforce behaviors in them that seem narcissistic. We elevate them in importance. Give them the sense that they are the center of the world. Take away their ability to develop empathy and dis-incentivize compassion on their part, and reward self-indulgence on their part. I am not mother-bashing here, although I was guilty of all of these behaviors with respect to my own child. What I am saying here is that no one person in a family can be seen in isolation apart from the others. I am part of the problem. I need to look at myself. I did this for a very long time with my son and with M. And then things happened with respect to each of them, and I ended up alone in my house. And little by little it became glorious. I have spent 3 days washing windows and blinds. What a blessing. [/QUOTE]
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