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At My Witt's End
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<blockquote data-quote="Overwhelmed1" data-source="post: 756927" data-attributes="member: 24921"><p>This is where I get myself into trouble. </p><p>My daughter responds to me so nicely after I declined joining them. She said the school gave her bags of plastic Easter eggs filled with surprises. She bought the kids a few things plus a big surprise for them. She said the kids will have to tell me what that is. She also said she got me something if I can ever make it back. This without me sending her money this past month.</p><p>She always prays for me and is very close with God. Would always text me scriptures and videos.</p><p>She hasn't in the last month but now she will since she reached out and I responded.</p><p>I don't get all of that when she at the same time treats me badly if she does not get her way or when she simply blows up at me unexpectedly.</p><p>My son and his girlfriend bought a ham and is planning a nice meal for today. Being very nice and cooperative. </p><p>They do these things and I feel like I blew everything out of proportion like I am the one with issues. </p><p>The wishy- washy self comes back. I get all confused. I don't know what I am doing. This has been the pattern throughout my life with them as adults. </p><p>Am I crazy? Am I blowing things up when it comes to them? I know everything I have been through with them is the truth but they make me feel guilty, unsure of myself, confused and defeated.</p><p>I am falling down again. I hate my life. I hate that I can't take control of my life. I hate that I don't have a clue of who I am. </p><p>I will be 62 and feel like at this stage of my life I should just throw my hands up and surrender to the fact that this is the way it is. I don't know if I can go through another round of this. </p><p>It's about to start all over again. Me letting them back in while things are going better with them. It's not like, as their mother, I would shun them when all looks good.</p><p>I still plan on getting my son out of my house and I am not going to pay for my daughter anymore but I don't know how to react to the rest of it. </p><p>I do love them both and I know stepping back when it comes to their living arrangements and their life's decisions are what is best for them and I will continue down this path. I have to admit though, that this process is easier for me when they are acting out.</p><p></p><p>Happy Easter everyone</p><p></p><p>Peace and Love</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Overwhelmed1, post: 756927, member: 24921"] This is where I get myself into trouble. My daughter responds to me so nicely after I declined joining them. She said the school gave her bags of plastic Easter eggs filled with surprises. She bought the kids a few things plus a big surprise for them. She said the kids will have to tell me what that is. She also said she got me something if I can ever make it back. This without me sending her money this past month. She always prays for me and is very close with God. Would always text me scriptures and videos. She hasn't in the last month but now she will since she reached out and I responded. I don't get all of that when she at the same time treats me badly if she does not get her way or when she simply blows up at me unexpectedly. My son and his girlfriend bought a ham and is planning a nice meal for today. Being very nice and cooperative. They do these things and I feel like I blew everything out of proportion like I am the one with issues. The wishy- washy self comes back. I get all confused. I don't know what I am doing. This has been the pattern throughout my life with them as adults. Am I crazy? Am I blowing things up when it comes to them? I know everything I have been through with them is the truth but they make me feel guilty, unsure of myself, confused and defeated. I am falling down again. I hate my life. I hate that I can't take control of my life. I hate that I don't have a clue of who I am. I will be 62 and feel like at this stage of my life I should just throw my hands up and surrender to the fact that this is the way it is. I don't know if I can go through another round of this. It's about to start all over again. Me letting them back in while things are going better with them. It's not like, as their mother, I would shun them when all looks good. I still plan on getting my son out of my house and I am not going to pay for my daughter anymore but I don't know how to react to the rest of it. I do love them both and I know stepping back when it comes to their living arrangements and their life's decisions are what is best for them and I will continue down this path. I have to admit though, that this process is easier for me when they are acting out. Happy Easter everyone Peace and Love [/QUOTE]
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