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attitudes of those in prison/jail?
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<blockquote data-quote="Ironbutterfly" data-source="post: 721978" data-attributes="member: 19951"><p>Yes, describes my son exactly. He is currently in county jail for probation violation and new charge on the old charge for probation violation. The Judge previously let him just do 30 days; now he is looking at 11 months. He wanted me to bail him out 5,000 no 10%. I refused. He cried, freaked out on phone. I stayed strong. He calls several times daily, saying he now wants to get help, do rehab vs. jail time, etc. He refused to get help over the past year when folks tried to help him. Now he wants me and his lawyer to get someone to come to court and convince the judge about this program he wants to do.</p><p></p><p> I so far, have not agreed to anything. He does take some of the blame for why he is in jail but not entirely, there are a lot of buts, this and that. He now wants to "deal" and "barter" and "do a program". Previous times he was in jail for probation violation (twice) he ran to another state and lived there for a while. Then he came back to town where he was wanted and got arrested and served 30 days and released only to rinse and repeat. I have a feeling this time, the Judge is going to make him do the 11 months.</p><p></p><p>He was doing good a year ago, but then slid badly back into ranting, raving, verbal threats to many folks who have helped in his life. Including me. It got so bad had to call out of state police and have them tell him to stop threatening me. I honestly feel if Judge lets him do a program vs. jail he will just run out of state again and the cycle will repeat. If he does, I am done. I just can't physically, mentally do this anymore. He is mentally challenged, albeit higher functioning, but he knows right from wrong.</p><p></p><p>I am leaning towards not doing anything for court- just showing up as I want to hear what Judge and attorney says. I didn't go to first hearing and regretted it after son gave a confusing report of what happened that doesn't make any sense. I wanted him to do this alone, reason I didn't go but I realize for my own sanity I have to know so that when he tries to say this was said I know it isn't the story.</p><p></p><p>I am struggling with a mentally challenged adult who refuses to listen and get any help- who does what he wants to whomever he wants when he doesn't get his way or people refuse to help him with money. He gets payees for his money then accuses them of stealing from him. I was one of those folks, his aunt another, a priest another. He refuses to go to an organization, prefers to get someone off the street to be his payee. He admits to smoking crack and smoking pot. He wants to get help now, change his life now that he is in jail now. I have heard this before. When do you stop believing, maybe this time?</p><p></p><p>I spoke with a therapist this week who said to me, wow, I don't even think he can do a program with all his mental challenges. So, he stays in jail, gets out, repeats the cycle of his bad choices, gets rearrested and repeats. Is that what his life will be? I think so.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Ironbutterfly, post: 721978, member: 19951"] Yes, describes my son exactly. He is currently in county jail for probation violation and new charge on the old charge for probation violation. The Judge previously let him just do 30 days; now he is looking at 11 months. He wanted me to bail him out 5,000 no 10%. I refused. He cried, freaked out on phone. I stayed strong. He calls several times daily, saying he now wants to get help, do rehab vs. jail time, etc. He refused to get help over the past year when folks tried to help him. Now he wants me and his lawyer to get someone to come to court and convince the judge about this program he wants to do. I so far, have not agreed to anything. He does take some of the blame for why he is in jail but not entirely, there are a lot of buts, this and that. He now wants to "deal" and "barter" and "do a program". Previous times he was in jail for probation violation (twice) he ran to another state and lived there for a while. Then he came back to town where he was wanted and got arrested and served 30 days and released only to rinse and repeat. I have a feeling this time, the Judge is going to make him do the 11 months. He was doing good a year ago, but then slid badly back into ranting, raving, verbal threats to many folks who have helped in his life. Including me. It got so bad had to call out of state police and have them tell him to stop threatening me. I honestly feel if Judge lets him do a program vs. jail he will just run out of state again and the cycle will repeat. If he does, I am done. I just can't physically, mentally do this anymore. He is mentally challenged, albeit higher functioning, but he knows right from wrong. I am leaning towards not doing anything for court- just showing up as I want to hear what Judge and attorney says. I didn't go to first hearing and regretted it after son gave a confusing report of what happened that doesn't make any sense. I wanted him to do this alone, reason I didn't go but I realize for my own sanity I have to know so that when he tries to say this was said I know it isn't the story. I am struggling with a mentally challenged adult who refuses to listen and get any help- who does what he wants to whomever he wants when he doesn't get his way or people refuse to help him with money. He gets payees for his money then accuses them of stealing from him. I was one of those folks, his aunt another, a priest another. He refuses to go to an organization, prefers to get someone off the street to be his payee. He admits to smoking crack and smoking pot. He wants to get help now, change his life now that he is in jail now. I have heard this before. When do you stop believing, maybe this time? I spoke with a therapist this week who said to me, wow, I don't even think he can do a program with all his mental challenges. So, he stays in jail, gets out, repeats the cycle of his bad choices, gets rearrested and repeats. Is that what his life will be? I think so. [/QUOTE]
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attitudes of those in prison/jail?
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