Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
B’s obsession
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 740088" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>How are you in any way culpable for what b does? I don't see it. You have done and are doing everything possible and more. In my view there can be no professional culpability here, by acting responsibly.</p><p></p><p>I would think your vulnerability individually could come more from not acting to protect your other children, as opposed to involving cps. But don't take my word for it please. In any event before I took such a step I would involve a family attorney with experience in such situations.</p><p></p><p>What I hope you are accepting now is that there is no 100 present right option...and that is why you feel like <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/2012/censored2.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":censored2:" title="censored2 :censored2:" data-shortname=":censored2:" />ing <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/2012/censored2.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":censored2:" title="censored2 :censored2:" data-shortname=":censored2:" />. Because you love every single person involved. And your life is at stake too. That is one reason I keep urging you to keep working at forgiving yourself. And all this goes for your husband too.</p><p></p><p>Many years ago I worked on a study of siblings of kids who had cystic fibrosis. It was almost exactly the same dynamic. All of the parents'focus and resources were on the ill child. The study was about how the other siblings were affected.</p><p></p><p>I think if you make it a front and center practice to acknowledge that you are in a circumstance that taxes everybody in horribly unrelenting ways this will become more bearable. Paradoxically.</p><p></p><p>I mean think about it. Should hurricane victims blame themselves for not coping? Or if you are on the Titanic and there's no space on the one life raft is it your fault? These events while affecting individuals are a product of causes way beyond them. Everybody is a victim.</p><p></p><p>All of us here come to the forum struggling with responsibility and guilt and a lack of control. We blame ourselves. Until we stop.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 740088, member: 18958"] How are you in any way culpable for what b does? I don't see it. You have done and are doing everything possible and more. In my view there can be no professional culpability here, by acting responsibly. I would think your vulnerability individually could come more from not acting to protect your other children, as opposed to involving cps. But don't take my word for it please. In any event before I took such a step I would involve a family attorney with experience in such situations. What I hope you are accepting now is that there is no 100 present right option...and that is why you feel like :censored2:ing :censored2:. Because you love every single person involved. And your life is at stake too. That is one reason I keep urging you to keep working at forgiving yourself. And all this goes for your husband too. Many years ago I worked on a study of siblings of kids who had cystic fibrosis. It was almost exactly the same dynamic. All of the parents'focus and resources were on the ill child. The study was about how the other siblings were affected. I think if you make it a front and center practice to acknowledge that you are in a circumstance that taxes everybody in horribly unrelenting ways this will become more bearable. Paradoxically. I mean think about it. Should hurricane victims blame themselves for not coping? Or if you are on the Titanic and there's no space on the one life raft is it your fault? These events while affecting individuals are a product of causes way beyond them. Everybody is a victim. All of us here come to the forum struggling with responsibility and guilt and a lack of control. We blame ourselves. Until we stop. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
B’s obsession
Top