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<blockquote data-quote="LeaMac" data-source="post: 754037" data-attributes="member: 22385"><p>Thanks you all for your supportive statements. They reinforce what my therapist tells me and what I already know, but hearing them again from all of you helps so much! Her asking for $50 is just like when she was actively using (but we didn’t realize it) , so I am not tempted to go down that road. Even when I bought her things like a warm winter coat, it disappeared- sold I guess for drug money. I have entertained the idea of taking her a meal, or meeting her at a restaurant. But anytime in the past that I made such a gesture, her demands skyrocketed. I am scared to relax the boundaries we have in place.</p><p></p><p>Last evening we heard a car door slam outside and both of us froze, worried that she might show up at the door. She lives an hour away and has no car, but still we panicked briefly. My therapist has warned me that once she is inside our home, it could be difficult to remove her if she refuses to leave. </p><p></p><p>I feel like a gulf is slowly opening between me and my friends, with their normal adult children and increasing numbers of grandchildren. They know my story up to a year ago, but I just can’t keep adding to it. No one knows what to say and it makes me feel even more estranged when they try to come up with supportive words.</p><p></p><p>So thank you all for the much needed pep talk.i guess you all know how much it helps.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="LeaMac, post: 754037, member: 22385"] Thanks you all for your supportive statements. They reinforce what my therapist tells me and what I already know, but hearing them again from all of you helps so much! Her asking for $50 is just like when she was actively using (but we didn’t realize it) , so I am not tempted to go down that road. Even when I bought her things like a warm winter coat, it disappeared- sold I guess for drug money. I have entertained the idea of taking her a meal, or meeting her at a restaurant. But anytime in the past that I made such a gesture, her demands skyrocketed. I am scared to relax the boundaries we have in place. Last evening we heard a car door slam outside and both of us froze, worried that she might show up at the door. She lives an hour away and has no car, but still we panicked briefly. My therapist has warned me that once she is inside our home, it could be difficult to remove her if she refuses to leave. I feel like a gulf is slowly opening between me and my friends, with their normal adult children and increasing numbers of grandchildren. They know my story up to a year ago, but I just can’t keep adding to it. No one knows what to say and it makes me feel even more estranged when they try to come up with supportive words. So thank you all for the much needed pep talk.i guess you all know how much it helps. [/QUOTE]
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