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Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
Been a while, but I'm sure few of you will be surprised that I'm back to square one
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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 604643" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>Scott, I don't want to hi-jack Wakegirl's post, however your words really impacted me. I can hear the pain, anger, frustration and sorrow in them.........and God, I so know how you feel, I guess many if not most of us do. For us parents this is a hell none of us know how to navigate through. All OUR hopes wrapped up in our children are dashed...........any recognition of what WE consider to be "normal" or healthy behavior........doesn't exist............whether it's drugs or mental illness, 'it' takes our kids away and leaves us devastated......I'm so sorry. </p><p></p><p>In addition to the pain and loss, in order to get on with <u>our</u> lives, we must learn how to detach from our kids, from <em>our </em>dreams for them, their futures, a relationship with them, all of it.............and that is a whole other journey. To eventually land in acceptance.......for me that was the key. To stop asking why, to stop being guilty, to stop feeling resentment, to stop being scared all the time about what MIGHT happen...........it's the hardest thing I've ever done...........but, I've done it and so can you........your son is in his thirties, my daughter is 40.........they have chosen the lives they are living and we are powerless to alter that fact.............Scott, go find peace of mind, life is not meant to be lived the way we live when we are embroiled in our adult kids dramas. Get whatever help you have to to get out of the hamster wheel and <strong>enjoy </strong>your days and moments.......you've given up too many already.........hugs.........</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 604643, member: 13542"] Scott, I don't want to hi-jack Wakegirl's post, however your words really impacted me. I can hear the pain, anger, frustration and sorrow in them.........and God, I so know how you feel, I guess many if not most of us do. For us parents this is a hell none of us know how to navigate through. All OUR hopes wrapped up in our children are dashed...........any recognition of what WE consider to be "normal" or healthy behavior........doesn't exist............whether it's drugs or mental illness, 'it' takes our kids away and leaves us devastated......I'm so sorry. In addition to the pain and loss, in order to get on with [U]our[/U] lives, we must learn how to detach from our kids, from [I]our [/I]dreams for them, their futures, a relationship with them, all of it.............and that is a whole other journey. To eventually land in acceptance.......for me that was the key. To stop asking why, to stop being guilty, to stop feeling resentment, to stop being scared all the time about what MIGHT happen...........it's the hardest thing I've ever done...........but, I've done it and so can you........your son is in his thirties, my daughter is 40.........they have chosen the lives they are living and we are powerless to alter that fact.............Scott, go find peace of mind, life is not meant to be lived the way we live when we are embroiled in our adult kids dramas. Get whatever help you have to to get out of the hamster wheel and [B]enjoy [/B]your days and moments.......you've given up too many already.........hugs......... [/QUOTE]
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Substance Abuse
Been a while, but I'm sure few of you will be surprised that I'm back to square one
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