Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Been here before. Looking for some advice
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Elsi" data-source="post: 740716" data-attributes="member: 23349"><p>I know you can’t control how your wife responds, but I would add that the more you can both keep you own emotional reactions in check the better. If your daughter is getting angry or abusive, end the conversation and walk away - no yelling, no lectures, just well we can’t talk when you’re like this so this conversation is over. If she wants something like food or clean clothes, just say well you know how to fix yourself something/put some laundry in. If she’s not happy with her food options, well, sorry you feel that way, that’s what we have. But try to stay neutral or positive and step out of the push/pull battle. Dont give her anything to push against - just matter of fact this is how it is. </p><p></p><p>I know my kids as they got to be that age got very good at pushing buttons, especially my husband’s, to get a reaction. And once they got that reaction the battle was won, because now they could tell themselves we were being unreasonable and therefore Whatever we said was invalid. They got to feel angry and justified and self righteous and keep doing whatever it was they were doing. It’s a trap, and the only out that I have found is keeping my reactions as bland and emotionless as possible.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Elsi, post: 740716, member: 23349"] I know you can’t control how your wife responds, but I would add that the more you can both keep you own emotional reactions in check the better. If your daughter is getting angry or abusive, end the conversation and walk away - no yelling, no lectures, just well we can’t talk when you’re like this so this conversation is over. If she wants something like food or clean clothes, just say well you know how to fix yourself something/put some laundry in. If she’s not happy with her food options, well, sorry you feel that way, that’s what we have. But try to stay neutral or positive and step out of the push/pull battle. Dont give her anything to push against - just matter of fact this is how it is. I know my kids as they got to be that age got very good at pushing buttons, especially my husband’s, to get a reaction. And once they got that reaction the battle was won, because now they could tell themselves we were being unreasonable and therefore Whatever we said was invalid. They got to feel angry and justified and self righteous and keep doing whatever it was they were doing. It’s a trap, and the only out that I have found is keeping my reactions as bland and emotionless as possible. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Been here before. Looking for some advice
Top