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Family of Origin
Being who we are, even if FOO is different and doesn't like it
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<blockquote data-quote="New Leaf" data-source="post: 671808" data-attributes="member: 19522"><p>I am thinking and thinking and thinking about this.</p><p></p><p>I for the life of me, cannot figure out why my whole family was under the spell of my sister.</p><p></p><p>Were they really, or is that my perception of it?</p><p>But, it seems so.</p><p></p><p>This is my song for her at this point</p><p>[MEDIA=youtube]zXlW4FGc8A0[/MEDIA]</p><p></p><p>As a child, </p><p>growing up </p><p>under her shadow,</p><p>I was half a person.</p><p>And still,</p><p>I feel guilty</p><p>and ashamed</p><p>for writing this.</p><p></p><p>She slowly, insidiously, </p><p>purposefully,</p><p>killed me.</p><p>To the point where </p><p>I did not want to be home anymore.</p><p>She was the beautiful one,</p><p>the popular one,</p><p>and I</p><p><em>too sensitive</em>,</p><p><em>too strange</em>.</p><p></p><p>It was not my parents doing,</p><p>but they did not stop it.</p><p>Could they have stopped it?</p><p>Was she so clever that they did not see?</p><p>Am I imagining all of this?</p><p></p><p>Were all siblings this way?</p><p>All I ever wanted, was to be her friend.</p><p></p><p>We became "friends" later on in life.</p><p>Then I realized,</p><p>as long as things went her way,</p><p>it would go smoothly.</p><p></p><p>The minute I had a different opinion</p><p>or showed my true feelings</p><p>my true self</p><p>it went wrong.</p><p></p><p>It is so strange, I still love her.</p><p>Still hold a place in my heart for her.</p><p></p><p>I know better now, then to open up to her.</p><p>I am becoming <em>whole</em></p><p>but she will only get <em>half,</em></p><p>because I cannot trust her </p><p>with all of me.</p><p></p><p>leafy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="New Leaf, post: 671808, member: 19522"] I am thinking and thinking and thinking about this. I for the life of me, cannot figure out why my whole family was under the spell of my sister. Were they really, or is that my perception of it? But, it seems so. This is my song for her at this point [MEDIA=youtube]zXlW4FGc8A0[/MEDIA] As a child, growing up under her shadow, I was half a person. And still, I feel guilty and ashamed for writing this. She slowly, insidiously, purposefully, killed me. To the point where I did not want to be home anymore. She was the beautiful one, the popular one, and I [I]too sensitive[/I], [I]too strange[/I]. It was not my parents doing, but they did not stop it. Could they have stopped it? Was she so clever that they did not see? Am I imagining all of this? Were all siblings this way? All I ever wanted, was to be her friend. We became "friends" later on in life. Then I realized, as long as things went her way, it would go smoothly. The minute I had a different opinion or showed my true feelings my true self it went wrong. It is so strange, I still love her. Still hold a place in my heart for her. I know better now, then to open up to her. I am becoming [I]whole[/I] but she will only get [I]half,[/I] because I cannot trust her with all of me. leafy [/QUOTE]
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Family of Origin
Being who we are, even if FOO is different and doesn't like it
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