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Family of Origin
Being who we are, even if FOO is different and doesn't like it
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 672882" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>I am like you. When I assume too much power or capacity, I feel shame.It is like who do you think you are? It is my mother's voice. Looked at this way, you have to evaluate a situation, the risks and how to handle it responsibly. This implies flexibility. Responding.</p><p></p><p>To me, judgment implies an inflexibility. Looking down from on high. Believing you know or do better. That is what I do not want to do. Because we are all in this together.</p><p></p><p>I am better served by looking at somebody and trying to figure out how I am like them. Or if I feel they are in trouble, when I have done such, and what in me is like they are. Not better. Not on high.</p><p>Well, don't you think it should be? This isn't a recipe or a paint by number. It is real life. </p><p></p><p>We are changing ways of thinking that we may have had for 50 or in my case, 60 years. I would want it to be hard, because I do not want to flip flop with my essential identity and how I understand myself and my life. My values or deeply held beliefs. I want there to be resistance and working through. That way I do not have to be afraid of changing, because I would have examined everything many times over, to see if it fits. </p><p></p><p>That is why posting helps me. In each response I try on an attitude, a belief, a course of action.</p><p></p><p>Try not to be so hard on yourself.</p><p></p><p>COPA</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 672882, member: 18958"] I am like you. When I assume too much power or capacity, I feel shame.It is like who do you think you are? It is my mother's voice. Looked at this way, you have to evaluate a situation, the risks and how to handle it responsibly. This implies flexibility. Responding. To me, judgment implies an inflexibility. Looking down from on high. Believing you know or do better. That is what I do not want to do. Because we are all in this together. I am better served by looking at somebody and trying to figure out how I am like them. Or if I feel they are in trouble, when I have done such, and what in me is like they are. Not better. Not on high. Well, don't you think it should be? This isn't a recipe or a paint by number. It is real life. We are changing ways of thinking that we may have had for 50 or in my case, 60 years. I would want it to be hard, because I do not want to flip flop with my essential identity and how I understand myself and my life. My values or deeply held beliefs. I want there to be resistance and working through. That way I do not have to be afraid of changing, because I would have examined everything many times over, to see if it fits. That is why posting helps me. In each response I try on an attitude, a belief, a course of action. Try not to be so hard on yourself. COPA [/QUOTE]
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Being who we are, even if FOO is different and doesn't like it
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