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Borderline Personality Disorder
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<blockquote data-quote="jbrain" data-source="post: 26877" data-attributes="member: 3450"><p>Hi,</p><p>I am in 2 online support groups for parents of kids with borderline personality disorder. I now don't think difficult child 1 actually has the disorder but she fit all the criteria when she was younger. She has been diagnosed with Borderline (BPD) traits. These 2 groups have been immensely helpful (as has this one of course)! One thing, there is a lot of bad information out there still--like there always has to be some sort of abuse, the parents are the cause, it is a hopeless disorder, etc.</p><p></p><p>Dialectical behavioral therapy is the recommended therapy for Borderline (BPD) and I actually think it is helpful for anyone! It is based on the idea of "radical acceptance"--accepting a person for who they are right now, accepting their feelings, not judging them, yet encouraging change. When my dtr was in her Residential Treatment Center (RTC) her therapist used dbt and it really helped--she was able to correct some of her "thinking errors"--I was amazed at how she interpreted things I had said and done many years ago, things I didn't even remember or were so insignificant to me. She had built them into huge mountains and interpreted them to mean that I didn't care about her. I see that I also have been susceptible to this kind of thinking. If my husband is extra quiet I might figure he is mad at me and start reacting to him from that viewpoint. If I just ask him why he is extra quiet instead of assuming I have done something to anger him I may find out he is mulling over something that needs to be done at his job--nothing to do with me! I have found that I tend to interpret people's facial expressions and moods as having something to do with me--it is all about me--when it may have nothing to do with me. </p><p></p><p>Another princple of DBT is "benign interpretation" or something like that--it means to put the most benign interpretation on others' words and actions instead of assuming the worst. It makes me think of my son--when he was a teen if I walked in a room where he was he would immediately get defensive and say, "what?" He assumed I was mad at him all the time and that my walking into the room was all about him.</p><p></p><p>Gotta go for now--</p><p>Jane</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="jbrain, post: 26877, member: 3450"] Hi, I am in 2 online support groups for parents of kids with borderline personality disorder. I now don't think difficult child 1 actually has the disorder but she fit all the criteria when she was younger. She has been diagnosed with Borderline (BPD) traits. These 2 groups have been immensely helpful (as has this one of course)! One thing, there is a lot of bad information out there still--like there always has to be some sort of abuse, the parents are the cause, it is a hopeless disorder, etc. Dialectical behavioral therapy is the recommended therapy for Borderline (BPD) and I actually think it is helpful for anyone! It is based on the idea of "radical acceptance"--accepting a person for who they are right now, accepting their feelings, not judging them, yet encouraging change. When my dtr was in her Residential Treatment Center (RTC) her therapist used dbt and it really helped--she was able to correct some of her "thinking errors"--I was amazed at how she interpreted things I had said and done many years ago, things I didn't even remember or were so insignificant to me. She had built them into huge mountains and interpreted them to mean that I didn't care about her. I see that I also have been susceptible to this kind of thinking. If my husband is extra quiet I might figure he is mad at me and start reacting to him from that viewpoint. If I just ask him why he is extra quiet instead of assuming I have done something to anger him I may find out he is mulling over something that needs to be done at his job--nothing to do with me! I have found that I tend to interpret people's facial expressions and moods as having something to do with me--it is all about me--when it may have nothing to do with me. Another princple of DBT is "benign interpretation" or something like that--it means to put the most benign interpretation on others' words and actions instead of assuming the worst. It makes me think of my son--when he was a teen if I walked in a room where he was he would immediately get defensive and say, "what?" He assumed I was mad at him all the time and that my walking into the room was all about him. Gotta go for now-- Jane [/QUOTE]
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