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General Parenting
Can an O.D.D child turn out ok?
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<blockquote data-quote="overwhelmedandneedhelp" data-source="post: 607652" data-attributes="member: 16931"><p>He has been diagnosis'd with Anxiety Disorder, Separation Disorder (last week's diagnosis), Dyslexia, Mixed Receptive Expressive Disorder, Word Retreival. 125 IQ. (this was last year's diagnosis). Anxiety makes total sense looking back to past events but we never saw full blown anxiety attacks until we moved. </p><p></p><p>He spent a week in the hospital last week where he was diagnosis'd with Anxiety with ODD characteristics. The refusal to go to school and aniety got him there. It was They had group therapy and individual therapy practically all day long and it did help. He is now in the out patient program where he receives counseling all day long for two weeks. </p><p></p><p>Yes, as to the husband, I was thinking about leaving but honestly I can not handle our son alone. And I didn't want to turn him over for husband to raise either as I think husband takes the majority of the blame for this. Husband takes the easy road and avoids conflict so when son acted out... husband did what ever he could do to stop son and never would take the tiem or allow me to take the time to teach lessons. So a lot of these issues are bad habits that husband created. I've always been a believer in raising a child to be as independent as possible.. but that doesn't seem to jive with husband's view. Son says jump, dad asks how high. And yes... he never wanted to go to counseling. I fiiiinnnally managed to get him convinced son needed counseling for after the dyslexia and MERD diagnosis since that psychologist recommended it. We were able to work some marriage tips/parenting tips into these sessions. </p><p></p><p>I do agree WE need marriage counseling as well but of course he doesn't. But I'm going to sign up for that and see where that goes.</p><p></p><p>As to what we're doing now with our son.. we have changed everything about home life. We have a set schedule and require everyone to sit down at the table for a home cooked meal. No more fast food for dinner in the car for the son.</p><p> </p><p>People have no idea how little control I had/have???? (as I'm still on the fence how long this cooperative parenting will last from husbands perspective). </p><p></p><p>My parents always barked orders to me as they saw what was happening as well... .. you need to do this, you need to do that, tell husband this tell him that... etc..... What they didn't understand is that I had for years tried to get change in the house and the husband would always do the opposite (gee doesn't that sound familiar), tell me something and never carry through, etc.... so yea I tried and when you're always put off like this you tend to give up. I quit fighting and let things be because nothing I suggested mattered and fighting in front of son wasn't a good idea. My parents don't live in the same state so all they saw was quick weekend visits and never saw the full household dynamic. </p><p></p><p>Even now I'm getting push back.. happened again tonight. Counselor told us to let son pick his own clothes. So I suggested to son he pick his own clothes... husband says... we'll get there. I'm like... okayyyyyyyyyy...???? So before son goes to bed he'll be picking clothes for tomorrow. In my mind, we have to set the tone now of how it's going to be. Its' not like picking clothes is a difficult thing for a boy right? It's a "this is life, this is how you act in life". </p><p></p><p>As to age.. son is 10.</p><p></p><p>And his sister is in her late 40's, never married, never had kids. But apparently knows more about raising boys that me.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="overwhelmedandneedhelp, post: 607652, member: 16931"] He has been diagnosis'd with Anxiety Disorder, Separation Disorder (last week's diagnosis), Dyslexia, Mixed Receptive Expressive Disorder, Word Retreival. 125 IQ. (this was last year's diagnosis). Anxiety makes total sense looking back to past events but we never saw full blown anxiety attacks until we moved. He spent a week in the hospital last week where he was diagnosis'd with Anxiety with ODD characteristics. The refusal to go to school and aniety got him there. It was They had group therapy and individual therapy practically all day long and it did help. He is now in the out patient program where he receives counseling all day long for two weeks. Yes, as to the husband, I was thinking about leaving but honestly I can not handle our son alone. And I didn't want to turn him over for husband to raise either as I think husband takes the majority of the blame for this. Husband takes the easy road and avoids conflict so when son acted out... husband did what ever he could do to stop son and never would take the tiem or allow me to take the time to teach lessons. So a lot of these issues are bad habits that husband created. I've always been a believer in raising a child to be as independent as possible.. but that doesn't seem to jive with husband's view. Son says jump, dad asks how high. And yes... he never wanted to go to counseling. I fiiiinnnally managed to get him convinced son needed counseling for after the dyslexia and MERD diagnosis since that psychologist recommended it. We were able to work some marriage tips/parenting tips into these sessions. I do agree WE need marriage counseling as well but of course he doesn't. But I'm going to sign up for that and see where that goes. As to what we're doing now with our son.. we have changed everything about home life. We have a set schedule and require everyone to sit down at the table for a home cooked meal. No more fast food for dinner in the car for the son. People have no idea how little control I had/have???? (as I'm still on the fence how long this cooperative parenting will last from husbands perspective). My parents always barked orders to me as they saw what was happening as well... .. you need to do this, you need to do that, tell husband this tell him that... etc..... What they didn't understand is that I had for years tried to get change in the house and the husband would always do the opposite (gee doesn't that sound familiar), tell me something and never carry through, etc.... so yea I tried and when you're always put off like this you tend to give up. I quit fighting and let things be because nothing I suggested mattered and fighting in front of son wasn't a good idea. My parents don't live in the same state so all they saw was quick weekend visits and never saw the full household dynamic. Even now I'm getting push back.. happened again tonight. Counselor told us to let son pick his own clothes. So I suggested to son he pick his own clothes... husband says... we'll get there. I'm like... okayyyyyyyyyy...???? So before son goes to bed he'll be picking clothes for tomorrow. In my mind, we have to set the tone now of how it's going to be. Its' not like picking clothes is a difficult thing for a boy right? It's a "this is life, this is how you act in life". As to age.. son is 10. And his sister is in her late 40's, never married, never had kids. But apparently knows more about raising boys that me. [/QUOTE]
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