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Can't vs Won't
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 747288" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>I was my sons guardian and he was amicable to it. When he felt ready not to have one, his case manager and I went to court and I was removed. It is complicated and the clients desire to have a guardian are taken i to account. A court must decide he needs one and has tje descretion to choose a stranger over yourself if they feel it is best that the parent not be the guardian. Such as if you dont get along.</p><p></p><p>My son had autism, which is a developmental delay so the court snd my son felt he needed to start adult life out with a guardian and my son picked me. He outgrew this need as he matured.</p><p></p><p>I truly do not know if becoming a guardian is easy or if anything happens to the adult if he wont abide by his guardian's wishes. I never tried to make rash decisions for my son. And he did not rebel.</p><p></p><p>My son is currently working with a case manager if he needs help. But my sons attitude is positive and respectful and is making good progress in every aspect of his life. I dont worry about him.</p><p></p><p>in my opinion guardianship will fail if the adult wont cooperate.</p><p></p><p>I am lucky perhaps and grateful that my son, who is my hero, is going to accept the help when he needs it so that he can mostly take care of himself. He has s lovely, safe subsidisized apartment that he never has to leave snd there is no caregiver there....the people who live there are not extremely disabled and are law abiding so it is a peaceful place to live, geared for people with developmental disabilities. He always works. He is a hard worker who does not feel badly getting help the 10 percent of the time he needs it.</p><p></p><p>You know if your adult child will gain from adult services or rebel against them. Many disabled adults have full, law abiding, fairly normal lives with a little community help.</p><p></p><p>Like all else, tje adult must be willing to help himself and cooperate. in my opinion a defiant adult wont accept help, which is very sad to me. With cooperation, nobody needs to forever live in the streets.</p><p></p><p>Of course drug use skews things. Where my son lives no drugs or smoking are allowed. My son is very happy about this. Those who are drug addicts may or may not have s harder time getting. services. But if your child is willing to try, sincerely try, I have seen the benefits of assistance.</p><p></p><p>You do need to get the adult on SSDI. If he is truly disabled, his life will be much better. But again he has to accept the help.</p><p></p><p>Some adults prefer the streets to any rules. in my opinion my heart goes out to those parents. I feel the parents often hurt more than the deliberately homeless adult.</p><p></p><p>Remember, people do change. Some will finally get tired of a crazy life and decide to cooperate. But it doesnt have much to do with us.</p><p></p><p>Never blame yourselves.its not your faults.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 747288, member: 1550"] I was my sons guardian and he was amicable to it. When he felt ready not to have one, his case manager and I went to court and I was removed. It is complicated and the clients desire to have a guardian are taken i to account. A court must decide he needs one and has tje descretion to choose a stranger over yourself if they feel it is best that the parent not be the guardian. Such as if you dont get along. My son had autism, which is a developmental delay so the court snd my son felt he needed to start adult life out with a guardian and my son picked me. He outgrew this need as he matured. I truly do not know if becoming a guardian is easy or if anything happens to the adult if he wont abide by his guardian's wishes. I never tried to make rash decisions for my son. And he did not rebel. My son is currently working with a case manager if he needs help. But my sons attitude is positive and respectful and is making good progress in every aspect of his life. I dont worry about him. in my opinion guardianship will fail if the adult wont cooperate. I am lucky perhaps and grateful that my son, who is my hero, is going to accept the help when he needs it so that he can mostly take care of himself. He has s lovely, safe subsidisized apartment that he never has to leave snd there is no caregiver there....the people who live there are not extremely disabled and are law abiding so it is a peaceful place to live, geared for people with developmental disabilities. He always works. He is a hard worker who does not feel badly getting help the 10 percent of the time he needs it. You know if your adult child will gain from adult services or rebel against them. Many disabled adults have full, law abiding, fairly normal lives with a little community help. Like all else, tje adult must be willing to help himself and cooperate. in my opinion a defiant adult wont accept help, which is very sad to me. With cooperation, nobody needs to forever live in the streets. Of course drug use skews things. Where my son lives no drugs or smoking are allowed. My son is very happy about this. Those who are drug addicts may or may not have s harder time getting. services. But if your child is willing to try, sincerely try, I have seen the benefits of assistance. You do need to get the adult on SSDI. If he is truly disabled, his life will be much better. But again he has to accept the help. Some adults prefer the streets to any rules. in my opinion my heart goes out to those parents. I feel the parents often hurt more than the deliberately homeless adult. Remember, people do change. Some will finally get tired of a crazy life and decide to cooperate. But it doesnt have much to do with us. Never blame yourselves.its not your faults. [/QUOTE]
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