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Family of Origin
Children of Narcissists: Manipulative and guilt-ridden types
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 666671" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p><span style="font-size: 18px"><strong>(From Wikipedia)</strong></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 18px"></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 18px"><strong>Children of narcissists</strong></span></p><p>Children of a resistant, more stubborn temperament parent defend against being supportive of others in the house. They observe how the selfish parents get their needs met by others. They learn how <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychological_manipulation" target="_blank">manipulation</a> and using guilt gets the parent what he or she wants. They develop a <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/False_self" target="_blank">false self</a> and use<a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aggression" target="_blank">aggression</a> and <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Intimidation" target="_blank">intimidation</a> to get their way.<a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissistic_parent#cite_note-ao-15" target="_blank">[15]</a> Some of the most common issues in narcissistic parenting are due to the lack of appropriate, responsible nurturing which ultimately contributes to a child’s feeling of emptiness, insecurity in loving relationships, imaginary fears, mistrust of others, identity conflict and inability to develop a unique existence from that of the parent.<a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissistic_parent#cite_note-16" target="_blank">[16]</a></p><p></p><p>The sensitive, guilt-ridden children in the family learn to meet the parent’s needs for <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gratification" target="_blank">gratification</a> and try to get love by accommodating the whims and wishes of the parent. The child’s normal feelings are ignored, <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Denied" target="_blank">denied</a> and eventually<a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychological_repression" target="_blank">repressed</a> in attempts to gain the parent’s “love”. Guilt and <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shame" target="_blank">shame</a> keep the child locked into this <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Developmental_arrest" target="_blank">developmental arrest</a>. Their aggressive impulses and rage become split off and are not integrated with normal development. These children develop a false self as a<a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Defense_mechanism" target="_blank">defense mechanism</a> and become<a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Codependent" target="_blank">codependent</a> in relationships. The child's unconscious denial of their <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/True_self" target="_blank">true self</a>perpetuates a cycle of <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-hatred" target="_blank">self-hatred</a>, fearing any reminder of their authentic self.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 666671, member: 18958"] [SIZE=5][B](From Wikipedia)[/B] [B][/B] [B]Children of narcissists[/B][/SIZE] Children of a resistant, more stubborn temperament parent defend against being supportive of others in the house. They observe how the selfish parents get their needs met by others. They learn how [URL='https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychological_manipulation']manipulation[/URL] and using guilt gets the parent what he or she wants. They develop a [URL='https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/False_self']false self[/URL] and use[URL='https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aggression']aggression[/URL] and [URL='https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Intimidation']intimidation[/URL] to get their way.[URL='https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissistic_parent#cite_note-ao-15'][15][/URL] Some of the most common issues in narcissistic parenting are due to the lack of appropriate, responsible nurturing which ultimately contributes to a child’s feeling of emptiness, insecurity in loving relationships, imaginary fears, mistrust of others, identity conflict and inability to develop a unique existence from that of the parent.[URL='https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissistic_parent#cite_note-16'][16][/URL] The sensitive, guilt-ridden children in the family learn to meet the parent’s needs for [URL='https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gratification']gratification[/URL] and try to get love by accommodating the whims and wishes of the parent. The child’s normal feelings are ignored, [URL='https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Denied']denied[/URL] and eventually[URL='https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychological_repression']repressed[/URL] in attempts to gain the parent’s “love”. Guilt and [URL='https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shame']shame[/URL] keep the child locked into this [URL='https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Developmental_arrest']developmental arrest[/URL]. Their aggressive impulses and rage become split off and are not integrated with normal development. These children develop a false self as a[URL='https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Defense_mechanism']defense mechanism[/URL] and become[URL='https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Codependent']codependent[/URL] in relationships. The child's unconscious denial of their [URL='https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/True_self']true self[/URL]perpetuates a cycle of [URL='https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-hatred']self-hatred[/URL], fearing any reminder of their authentic self. [/QUOTE]
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