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The Watercooler
"Choices" vs "Circumstances"...
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<blockquote data-quote="mstang67chic" data-source="post: 325875" data-attributes="member: 2459"><p>First of all I think that drug rep needs slapped. Although, I'm SURE (coughcough) her life is positively perfect. </p><p></p><p>Personally, I think choices vs circumstances is a bit like Nurture vs Nature. It's a bit of both. You can make all the "right" choices and still wind up somewhere you don't want to be. At the same time, there are people who have made "bad" choices and things still seem to fall into place for them. </p><p></p><p>Besides, there are plenty of people in the world who do the right thing. They work hard, live well within their means, save their money and still wind up with nothing. It could be job related, health related, whatever....it happens. </p><p></p><p>To have that kind of an attitude towards people though...stupid. What about people who have made bad choices, spent their money unwisely but now want to do better? Are we supposed to condemn them because of their past? </p><p></p><p>Look at me. I was raised in a household where we didn't have a lot of money. There was never much of a savings account and had we had something major happen, we would have been in serious trouble. As an adult, I don't want to live like that but have found myself in the same situation. No, neither I or husband are the best about saving money, spending wisely, etc., but we're not ones to toss money out the window either. What we are, are people who have had things happen. Jobs lost, unexpected bills, a difficult child....basically real life. The same can be said for personal things too. I mentioned before that we are going to give the fertility treatments one more shot. It <em>could</em> be said that I don't deserve it. Why? Because one of the reasons I've been told I have issues is...um....let's just call it "young and stupid". There were problems in the past brought on by my own behavior that, while taken care of then, probably caused damage. However, that's not the only reason I've been told I have problems. There are other things that were and still are out of my control. I understand that my own actions brought SOME of this on and I've punished myself enough. At the same time though, I realize that even if those things hadn't happened, because of the other things, I could have still found myself in this position. And if someone told me that I shouldn't be able to get help and/or I deserved it or brought it on myself? I would be telling that person something about a frog's geneolgy. </p><p></p><p>Obviously, when we as a community or individual, try to help someone, we want to know that that person is going cooperate. We're not going to give money to a compulsive gambler for example, if that person is still gambling. But to assume that a person is in financial difficulties because of poor choices....asinine. And as I said before....that may very well have been the case but shouldn't mean that the person doesn't want to turn things around.</p><p></p><p>A bit of rambling perhaps, but that's my take on things.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="mstang67chic, post: 325875, member: 2459"] First of all I think that drug rep needs slapped. Although, I'm SURE (coughcough) her life is positively perfect. Personally, I think choices vs circumstances is a bit like Nurture vs Nature. It's a bit of both. You can make all the "right" choices and still wind up somewhere you don't want to be. At the same time, there are people who have made "bad" choices and things still seem to fall into place for them. Besides, there are plenty of people in the world who do the right thing. They work hard, live well within their means, save their money and still wind up with nothing. It could be job related, health related, whatever....it happens. To have that kind of an attitude towards people though...stupid. What about people who have made bad choices, spent their money unwisely but now want to do better? Are we supposed to condemn them because of their past? Look at me. I was raised in a household where we didn't have a lot of money. There was never much of a savings account and had we had something major happen, we would have been in serious trouble. As an adult, I don't want to live like that but have found myself in the same situation. No, neither I or husband are the best about saving money, spending wisely, etc., but we're not ones to toss money out the window either. What we are, are people who have had things happen. Jobs lost, unexpected bills, a difficult child....basically real life. The same can be said for personal things too. I mentioned before that we are going to give the fertility treatments one more shot. It [I]could[/I] be said that I don't deserve it. Why? Because one of the reasons I've been told I have issues is...um....let's just call it "young and stupid". There were problems in the past brought on by my own behavior that, while taken care of then, probably caused damage. However, that's not the only reason I've been told I have problems. There are other things that were and still are out of my control. I understand that my own actions brought SOME of this on and I've punished myself enough. At the same time though, I realize that even if those things hadn't happened, because of the other things, I could have still found myself in this position. And if someone told me that I shouldn't be able to get help and/or I deserved it or brought it on myself? I would be telling that person something about a frog's geneolgy. Obviously, when we as a community or individual, try to help someone, we want to know that that person is going cooperate. We're not going to give money to a compulsive gambler for example, if that person is still gambling. But to assume that a person is in financial difficulties because of poor choices....asinine. And as I said before....that may very well have been the case but shouldn't mean that the person doesn't want to turn things around. A bit of rambling perhaps, but that's my take on things. [/QUOTE]
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