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Concerned about 12-year old granddaughter
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 717825" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Although she needs to eventually realize that her behavior is on her, it is valid that she is angry at and blames her mothers neglect for her problems. They ARE a big part 4of it. She needs to be able to talk about it until she is in a place where she can let it go. Few kids from her background do not become angry and disturbed because of things like that that they had no control over. Dont tell her its not her mothers fault. in my opinion thats not entirely true. She would probably be better off emotionally if her parents hadnt ended up in jail. This is hard for any child to carry around. Her adoption doesnt cancel out her early years and family history. She was not adopted as a baby. She is going to feel different. I feel much of her behavior is due to her early years, typical of kids adopted at older ages who had been passed around more than once. In general these are attachment problems, uber common in kids who change caregivers and have unstable early years. Plus she has her parent's genes...a hard deck of cards.</p><p>Nice material goods do not help unattached kids learn to trust people. Intensive therapy can, but not always. Yes, they lie and steal and often have a lack of empathy.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 717825, member: 1550"] Although she needs to eventually realize that her behavior is on her, it is valid that she is angry at and blames her mothers neglect for her problems. They ARE a big part 4of it. She needs to be able to talk about it until she is in a place where she can let it go. Few kids from her background do not become angry and disturbed because of things like that that they had no control over. Dont tell her its not her mothers fault. in my opinion thats not entirely true. She would probably be better off emotionally if her parents hadnt ended up in jail. This is hard for any child to carry around. Her adoption doesnt cancel out her early years and family history. She was not adopted as a baby. She is going to feel different. I feel much of her behavior is due to her early years, typical of kids adopted at older ages who had been passed around more than once. In general these are attachment problems, uber common in kids who change caregivers and have unstable early years. Plus she has her parent's genes...a hard deck of cards. Nice material goods do not help unattached kids learn to trust people. Intensive therapy can, but not always. Yes, they lie and steal and often have a lack of empathy. [/QUOTE]
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Concerned about 12-year old granddaughter
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