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Contact with homeless son. Wants to visit and stay for couple of nights.
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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 621881" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>I have a slightly different take on it Lucy. Your son has made a lifestyle choice which is quite different then the 'norm' which is certainly fine for him. However, that choice and his lack of hygiene impacts others. That is the natural consequence of his choices. To ask your husband to check out seems inconsiderate to me, your son gets to do what he desires at the possible inconvenience of someone who is not making choices that impact others negatively. </p><p></p><p>I would bring it up as an option to your husband without making him feel as if this is the ONLY option so he actually feels as if he has a choice. And, then discuss your desire to see your son, without putting the onus on your husband as that is the only way it will work if he exits. </p><p></p><p>In my opinion, your sons desire to see you shouldn't disrupt the entire family, the family should pull together as a unit and discuss the options for you to see your son. Accommodating him at the expense of others doesn't feel right to me. However, using it as an opportunity for the family to create options which work for EVERYBODY feels better. And, the option may be that your son has to deal with where he stays and you see him outside of your home.........or he can come for one day without staying over, I don't really have an answer, but if you and your husband and your daughter all open a dialogue for options, you may come up with some creative ideas.</p><p></p><p>I believe that since your son is an adult and he has made clear choices in his lifestyle, he has to be responsible for the consequences of that choice. Good luck! Let us know how it turns out........</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 621881, member: 13542"] I have a slightly different take on it Lucy. Your son has made a lifestyle choice which is quite different then the 'norm' which is certainly fine for him. However, that choice and his lack of hygiene impacts others. That is the natural consequence of his choices. To ask your husband to check out seems inconsiderate to me, your son gets to do what he desires at the possible inconvenience of someone who is not making choices that impact others negatively. I would bring it up as an option to your husband without making him feel as if this is the ONLY option so he actually feels as if he has a choice. And, then discuss your desire to see your son, without putting the onus on your husband as that is the only way it will work if he exits. In my opinion, your sons desire to see you shouldn't disrupt the entire family, the family should pull together as a unit and discuss the options for you to see your son. Accommodating him at the expense of others doesn't feel right to me. However, using it as an opportunity for the family to create options which work for EVERYBODY feels better. And, the option may be that your son has to deal with where he stays and you see him outside of your home.........or he can come for one day without staying over, I don't really have an answer, but if you and your husband and your daughter all open a dialogue for options, you may come up with some creative ideas. I believe that since your son is an adult and he has made clear choices in his lifestyle, he has to be responsible for the consequences of that choice. Good luck! Let us know how it turns out........ [/QUOTE]
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Contact with homeless son. Wants to visit and stay for couple of nights.
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