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Parent Emeritus
Court case is over and Bart isnt happy
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 741743" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Bart is impossible, SWOT. I am not saying otherwise, but you have choices too.</p><p></p><p>When he starts talking like this (the quote) you COULD get off the phone. You KNOW that when he starts in like this that he is going NOWHERE good. He is being mean to you. He knows how you will react. He knows you hate it. He just does not want to control himself.</p><p></p><p>He can NEVER threaten suicide even if it is to make a point. This is very, very cruel. But you engaged. You took his bait. You took his bait and you stayed in conversation with him, while he was talking mean nonsense.</p><p></p><p>This is something that you can learn to control. You know you cannot control him but you have control over what you do. Bart is living the life he chooses. You know that. He has loads of good things in his life, that other people do not have. Money for one. A lovely child, even more important. A home. Hobbies. A great job. All of the girlfriends he wants. A loving mother.</p><p></p><p>He and his ex-wife have earned this Parental Coordinator. Both of them have. No matter how horrible is the ex-wife (and she is horrible, I recognize that) he is her match in terms of his unwillingness to moderate his behavior and cooperate even a little bit.</p><p></p><p>But the thing is Bart loves you. I think part of our job as mothers is to train our sons how to love us. While Bart does not care if he hurts you in these conversations, I believe he can learn self-control with you. He can learn it because he is motivated to be connected to you. He cannot and does not want to lose you. I feel convinced he will learn to be less hurtful if you show him how by the limits you set.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 741743, member: 18958"] Bart is impossible, SWOT. I am not saying otherwise, but you have choices too. When he starts talking like this (the quote) you COULD get off the phone. You KNOW that when he starts in like this that he is going NOWHERE good. He is being mean to you. He knows how you will react. He knows you hate it. He just does not want to control himself. He can NEVER threaten suicide even if it is to make a point. This is very, very cruel. But you engaged. You took his bait. You took his bait and you stayed in conversation with him, while he was talking mean nonsense. This is something that you can learn to control. You know you cannot control him but you have control over what you do. Bart is living the life he chooses. You know that. He has loads of good things in his life, that other people do not have. Money for one. A lovely child, even more important. A home. Hobbies. A great job. All of the girlfriends he wants. A loving mother. He and his ex-wife have earned this Parental Coordinator. Both of them have. No matter how horrible is the ex-wife (and she is horrible, I recognize that) he is her match in terms of his unwillingness to moderate his behavior and cooperate even a little bit. But the thing is Bart loves you. I think part of our job as mothers is to train our sons how to love us. While Bart does not care if he hurts you in these conversations, I believe he can learn self-control with you. He can learn it because he is motivated to be connected to you. He cannot and does not want to lose you. I feel convinced he will learn to be less hurtful if you show him how by the limits you set. [/QUOTE]
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Court case is over and Bart isnt happy
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