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D average and in-school suspension
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<blockquote data-quote="meowbunny" data-source="post: 216958" data-attributes="member: 3626"><p>Gotta love when one of the pros actually knows something about ODD. You have a pretty good principal there.</p><p> </p><p>My daughter was one of those who refused to do homework. Heck, she refused to do work in class and this started in 3rd grade! I agree that rewards geared to the future did not work for her, either. Rewards had to be immediate and definitely not even one day in the future. For homework, I'd break it down. If you read the book, you get to watch TV for 2 hours and you pick the station/program (with mom veto power if inappropriate). Do one-half of the outline, we play a game together. The other half and you choose -- TV, game, go somewhere and have a treat. It didn't work all the time but it did work sometimes. I also added a long-term reward. C or better average for the school year got a year's pass to the local amusement park. </p><p> </p><p>It's a shame our kids to see beyond an hour or two, but they really can't. Future goals/rewards/consequences just don't seem to equate to their minds. They are "now children." Even 30 minutes or an hour can truly be inconceivable to them. It took me until my daughter was almost an adult to understand this. I wish I had known it earlier. It would have made life so much easier for both of us.</p><p> </p><p>Good luck on getting him to do the school work. You might try getting an older kid work with him after school to do the work. Sometimes doing the job with someone that our kids admire gives them some impetus to do what is necessary and looking good is important (not to us but to their peers or those they admire), so long as someone is not seen as someone having authority. That just gets automatic refusal. At least it did with my daughter.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="meowbunny, post: 216958, member: 3626"] Gotta love when one of the pros actually knows something about ODD. You have a pretty good principal there. My daughter was one of those who refused to do homework. Heck, she refused to do work in class and this started in 3rd grade! I agree that rewards geared to the future did not work for her, either. Rewards had to be immediate and definitely not even one day in the future. For homework, I'd break it down. If you read the book, you get to watch TV for 2 hours and you pick the station/program (with mom veto power if inappropriate). Do one-half of the outline, we play a game together. The other half and you choose -- TV, game, go somewhere and have a treat. It didn't work all the time but it did work sometimes. I also added a long-term reward. C or better average for the school year got a year's pass to the local amusement park. It's a shame our kids to see beyond an hour or two, but they really can't. Future goals/rewards/consequences just don't seem to equate to their minds. They are "now children." Even 30 minutes or an hour can truly be inconceivable to them. It took me until my daughter was almost an adult to understand this. I wish I had known it earlier. It would have made life so much easier for both of us. Good luck on getting him to do the school work. You might try getting an older kid work with him after school to do the work. Sometimes doing the job with someone that our kids admire gives them some impetus to do what is necessary and looking good is important (not to us but to their peers or those they admire), so long as someone is not seen as someone having authority. That just gets automatic refusal. At least it did with my daughter. [/QUOTE]
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