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Failure to Thrive
Desperate and running low on hope- please help
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<blockquote data-quote="Ironbutterfly" data-source="post: 693726" data-attributes="member: 19951"><p>I do echo the advice of SWOT and Copa- you have to set the rules in the house. Like he can't sit around in his dark room, not doing anything all day except mope around. He will do one positive thing every day to keep moving along. </p><p></p><p>When he says he wants to give up, tell him no, you will not give up. When he says he can't do this anymore, say Yes you can. Be firm and matter of factly. Most of us have lost a love of our life, the one we thought was the ONE. Since he refuses therapy, find some books on helping him move through the loss of the love of his life. Start there.</p><p></p><p>YOU need to find a support group for yourself. Don't give up- I know how you feel, when things pile up and just feel it would be easier to end it. You are running scared from so many things. Have faith, things will work out. I once was where you are now- a good friend saved me. I am so thankful for her to this day. Without her, I would never have known my beautiful grand-children, to have all the great memories I have today, to see the progress my difficult son has made in his life, albeit took long time. REFUSE TO GIVE UP. </p><p></p><p>Protect your job at all costs, especially if your husband might lose his down the road. Even if he does, there is always hope he can find another job. If it comes to losing your home- others have been there, you can always find a place to rent. Not sure if you are in the US or not. If you are in the states, read your foreclosure rules. In Michigan where I am, you have 6 months before they actually foreclose. YOU can save money to find another place to live. There are ALWAYS OPTIONS and solutions. I had friends that lost their homes and they were heart broken but it all worked out for them. They moved on and restarted again. </p><p></p><p>Do you have any 401K's or IRA's to fall back on financially? </p><p></p><p>Keep the faith that all will work again, maybe not as you pictured it, but there will be doors opened for you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Ironbutterfly, post: 693726, member: 19951"] I do echo the advice of SWOT and Copa- you have to set the rules in the house. Like he can't sit around in his dark room, not doing anything all day except mope around. He will do one positive thing every day to keep moving along. When he says he wants to give up, tell him no, you will not give up. When he says he can't do this anymore, say Yes you can. Be firm and matter of factly. Most of us have lost a love of our life, the one we thought was the ONE. Since he refuses therapy, find some books on helping him move through the loss of the love of his life. Start there. YOU need to find a support group for yourself. Don't give up- I know how you feel, when things pile up and just feel it would be easier to end it. You are running scared from so many things. Have faith, things will work out. I once was where you are now- a good friend saved me. I am so thankful for her to this day. Without her, I would never have known my beautiful grand-children, to have all the great memories I have today, to see the progress my difficult son has made in his life, albeit took long time. REFUSE TO GIVE UP. Protect your job at all costs, especially if your husband might lose his down the road. Even if he does, there is always hope he can find another job. If it comes to losing your home- others have been there, you can always find a place to rent. Not sure if you are in the US or not. If you are in the states, read your foreclosure rules. In Michigan where I am, you have 6 months before they actually foreclose. YOU can save money to find another place to live. There are ALWAYS OPTIONS and solutions. I had friends that lost their homes and they were heart broken but it all worked out for them. They moved on and restarted again. Do you have any 401K's or IRA's to fall back on financially? Keep the faith that all will work again, maybe not as you pictured it, but there will be doors opened for you. [/QUOTE]
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Desperate and running low on hope- please help
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