DGD...the rest of the story...

[ksm]

Today I found I found out that her boyfriend is in jail for 4th degree domestic violence. And she is the one that called the police, after having to go to two different neighbors homes to get someone to call the police. And this time she admitted the abuse to the police. A couple weeks ago, police were called but she would not admit he had put his hands on her.

BFs family has been notified that he is in jail in another state. I have no clue how long before he is out. I googled his charges and he could be in jail for up to 1 year and up to $5000 plus fees. He has had 2 DV charges here...but the record said battery...not sure if he plead down to lower charges. He had 3 battery charges and a criminal restraint charge since he was over 18. I hope they take that in to account.

So I guess she is ready to start her life over without him. I feel bad doubting her words about wanting to come home. I feel she will need therapy to get thru this. I am sure she is conflicted about being the one who led to his being incarcerated. I know he is the one who caused him being in jail. But I know she will feel responsible.

I dont know when she will return... it also scares me that her boyfriend will eventually end up back here too.

Prayers that she and sweet great grandson will come thru this stronger... ksm

 

[Copabanana]

Dear Ksm

I am wondering why she didn't tell you this up front. Despite the horror of this, I am so relieved for her, the baby and you and your husband. I know you must be so proud of her (let alone relieved) that she acted to protect herself and the baby.

So what is the time frame now? Oh. I am re-reading and see that you don't know when she will return. I don't know how far away she is. I am wishing she and the baby were home already. I can imagine how you feel.'

What a horrible person he is. I am sorry.

 

[ksm]

She doesn't have a phone...boyfriend has probably destroyed 3 phones since she got there...and I don't think she wants to tell us...as she knows we have dealt with their dangerous relationship for 7 years. We have heard there is a strict no contact order between them from the state. Of course, with a child in the mix, there will probably be future contact. Not sure if he will keep trying to pull her back in. He knows that she and baby are his meal ticket.

As much as I am so glad he is in jail...I hurt for his parents. It has to be hard for them. And they probably wonder if the baby will be a part of their lives. Ksm

 

[RN0441]

So glad that the truth finally came out.

And I hope and pray she is really through with him for good but you know how these DV situations are. They have beaten down the woman's self esteem so much and that leads them to blame themselves. Sounds crazy to outsiders and it is crazy but this is the pattern of abusers.

I am wondering if she didn't tell you right away because she didn't want him to "look bad" or look any worse in your eyes.

I don't mean to be the Doubting Thomas here but my life experiences have made my very cynical. Just protect your heart along with protecting her and your great grandson.

Keep us posted!

 

[MissLulu]

Ksm, I am relieved to hear this update. I hope she will be home soon.
You are so kind to find compassion for his parents. As the mother of a son who has behaved in ways I'm not proud of and don't condone, it warms my heart to know there are people like you in the world.
I hope you get to see that little baby very soon and that this is the beginning of a better time for you all.