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Difficult Child sleeping until 3pm
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 751444" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Many years ago I learned the concept of "private conversation." This refers to the self-talk that goes on inside of all of us, that is mostly debilitating "noise." The debates back and forth within us that only deprive us of resolve, self-confidence and true information. I am the master of this.</p><p></p><p>The quote above is a good example of what I talk about. You refer to a feeling state and a judgement. I would argue that neither one is useful to you or based in reality.</p><p></p><p>The reality is you are doing something very brave, very difficult and very commendable. You are taking a stand to change yourself, your life, your relationships with your children, and potentially giving them the opportunity to do the same in their own lives.</p><p>You are right now worrying about a future that does not yet exist. You know nothing about what will be at the time, who you will be, who your sons will be, what you will want or feel, or what you will be doing. How in the world could anybody know about future time?</p><p></p><p>We can think about what we would want to be, what we would want in the future, to do and to have...and with these intentions, make decisions about now. Like if you decide you want to be a world traveler, you could right now begin arranging your life to make possible that goal.</p><p></p><p>But specific thinks over which we have zero control, how could anybody know what they will want, should do, at some hypothetical time? This kind of thinking just brings us down. I for one cannot control it. I can't stop this thinking when it comes up. But I can detect it. When I do it. And I can try to distract myself and try to engage with something that is more constructive, productive or makes me feel good. Like walking. Or reading.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 751444, member: 18958"] Many years ago I learned the concept of "private conversation." This refers to the self-talk that goes on inside of all of us, that is mostly debilitating "noise." The debates back and forth within us that only deprive us of resolve, self-confidence and true information. I am the master of this. The quote above is a good example of what I talk about. You refer to a feeling state and a judgement. I would argue that neither one is useful to you or based in reality. The reality is you are doing something very brave, very difficult and very commendable. You are taking a stand to change yourself, your life, your relationships with your children, and potentially giving them the opportunity to do the same in their own lives. You are right now worrying about a future that does not yet exist. You know nothing about what will be at the time, who you will be, who your sons will be, what you will want or feel, or what you will be doing. How in the world could anybody know about future time? We can think about what we would want to be, what we would want in the future, to do and to have...and with these intentions, make decisions about now. Like if you decide you want to be a world traveler, you could right now begin arranging your life to make possible that goal. But specific thinks over which we have zero control, how could anybody know what they will want, should do, at some hypothetical time? This kind of thinking just brings us down. I for one cannot control it. I can't stop this thinking when it comes up. But I can detect it. When I do it. And I can try to distract myself and try to engage with something that is more constructive, productive or makes me feel good. Like walking. Or reading. [/QUOTE]
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