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Difficult Child sleeping until 3pm
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember1" data-source="post: 751445" data-attributes="member: 23706"><p>If you can open up a conversation that your sons will respect that do NOT in any way involve gas or money or what you must send them, then you can begin to have a loving, normal, evolving mother/son relationshipb with them. One in which they understand, accept your point of view and no longer ask for anything material of you.</p><p></p><p> If not, any relationship will be only one of them getting from you and that is not a real relationship to me. I wonder how many of our kids never think about us except as their means to money without work. Would they call us at all if we offered them nothing but our unconditional love?</p><p></p><p>Kay does not contact us at all since we cut off all money. Its been a while now. We may never hear from her again. Typing this causes sadness in my heart, but we have others to think about and will not go there again. It is up to her to ask for a relationship or not, and we won't pay to have a poor relationship with her. Not anymore.</p><p></p><p>I have stood in your shoes and probably gave more to our child than most. It puzzles me now, but, as Copa said somewhere, I felt like I could not be whole if she was not, at least as far as basic needs.</p><p></p><p>She was dead inside anyway. Nothing we ever gave her made her whole. We kept trying. It never worked.</p><p></p><p>I can not see any reason why two grown unemployed boys need gas. Air conditioning? Way back when I was a kid with the dinosaurs <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /> we had no air conditioning in the hot weather and we lived in a scorching hot state. Starts with an A. I lived to talk about it.</p><p></p><p>When we had to move to a hot/cold state my parents made little and in the winter we set the thermostat to 60 (I believe) and put on warm clothes and walked what seemed like forever to and from school. I am still alive. Your sons can find comfortable places to hang out with air conditioning like libraries and it gets cooler when the sun goes down for sleeping. They don't need all that gas to make things comfortable when they can at least work a pizza delivery job which would cover gas.</p><p></p><p>I personally feel we did the right thind for Kay and for us and our many other loved ones who need US healthy and whole.</p><p></p><p> You have to do what is best for ALL your loved ones and for you, whatever that is. I hope you can talk to somebody you trust in real life. I hope you find peace very soon. in my opinion you are doing great!</p><p></p><p>God bless you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember1, post: 751445, member: 23706"] If you can open up a conversation that your sons will respect that do NOT in any way involve gas or money or what you must send them, then you can begin to have a loving, normal, evolving mother/son relationshipb with them. One in which they understand, accept your point of view and no longer ask for anything material of you. If not, any relationship will be only one of them getting from you and that is not a real relationship to me. I wonder how many of our kids never think about us except as their means to money without work. Would they call us at all if we offered them nothing but our unconditional love? Kay does not contact us at all since we cut off all money. Its been a while now. We may never hear from her again. Typing this causes sadness in my heart, but we have others to think about and will not go there again. It is up to her to ask for a relationship or not, and we won't pay to have a poor relationship with her. Not anymore. I have stood in your shoes and probably gave more to our child than most. It puzzles me now, but, as Copa said somewhere, I felt like I could not be whole if she was not, at least as far as basic needs. She was dead inside anyway. Nothing we ever gave her made her whole. We kept trying. It never worked. I can not see any reason why two grown unemployed boys need gas. Air conditioning? Way back when I was a kid with the dinosaurs :) we had no air conditioning in the hot weather and we lived in a scorching hot state. Starts with an A. I lived to talk about it. When we had to move to a hot/cold state my parents made little and in the winter we set the thermostat to 60 (I believe) and put on warm clothes and walked what seemed like forever to and from school. I am still alive. Your sons can find comfortable places to hang out with air conditioning like libraries and it gets cooler when the sun goes down for sleeping. They don't need all that gas to make things comfortable when they can at least work a pizza delivery job which would cover gas. I personally feel we did the right thind for Kay and for us and our many other loved ones who need US healthy and whole. You have to do what is best for ALL your loved ones and for you, whatever that is. I hope you can talk to somebody you trust in real life. I hope you find peace very soon. in my opinion you are doing great! God bless you. [/QUOTE]
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