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Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
Emergency custody order, didn't go as planned.
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<blockquote data-quote="toughlovin" data-source="post: 631195" data-attributes="member: 15801"><p>Hi.... I feel for you so much as I have been where you are. You are doing all the right things. Drug use by our kids does terrible things really.....it can make a child who was difficult growing up totally impossible to be with. My son is now 22 but we have been going through this for years and years and also had to kick our son out when he was 18..... and part of what kept me strong was I had a younger daughter to protect. And you do need to protect your younger son from all the chaos that happens when your drug using adult lives there. So yes you are doing the right thing by not letting him come back to the house. If he comes definitely call the police!</p><p></p><p>Our stand with our son has always been we will help you when you want help, and not help you when you don't. My son has been homeless (that was the worst for me), been in jail and been in numerous rehabs. I think he learns a little bit each time but it seems to be a slow process for him.</p><p></p><p>At this point he is involved in drug court which although that is one reason he has been in jail, they are also working hard to keep finding him help so it is no longer on us to find him the help which has been a godsend.</p><p></p><p>Just be prepared that if your son ends up homeless, or even if not if he keeps using, he will probably end up getting in trouble with the legal system..... and that is on him. And although the legal system has many many flaws sometimes it helps and it does start to hold them accountable (although it took many arrests with my son for it to finally do that).</p><p></p><p>Keep posting. Oh and I second the value of alanon meetings. I found a great meeting for parents that has been absolutely wonderful support for me.</p><p></p><p>TL</p><p></p><p></p><p>Sent using ConductDisorders mobile app</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="toughlovin, post: 631195, member: 15801"] Hi.... I feel for you so much as I have been where you are. You are doing all the right things. Drug use by our kids does terrible things really.....it can make a child who was difficult growing up totally impossible to be with. My son is now 22 but we have been going through this for years and years and also had to kick our son out when he was 18..... and part of what kept me strong was I had a younger daughter to protect. And you do need to protect your younger son from all the chaos that happens when your drug using adult lives there. So yes you are doing the right thing by not letting him come back to the house. If he comes definitely call the police! Our stand with our son has always been we will help you when you want help, and not help you when you don't. My son has been homeless (that was the worst for me), been in jail and been in numerous rehabs. I think he learns a little bit each time but it seems to be a slow process for him. At this point he is involved in drug court which although that is one reason he has been in jail, they are also working hard to keep finding him help so it is no longer on us to find him the help which has been a godsend. Just be prepared that if your son ends up homeless, or even if not if he keeps using, he will probably end up getting in trouble with the legal system..... and that is on him. And although the legal system has many many flaws sometimes it helps and it does start to hold them accountable (although it took many arrests with my son for it to finally do that). Keep posting. Oh and I second the value of alanon meetings. I found a great meeting for parents that has been absolutely wonderful support for me. TL Sent using ConductDisorders mobile app [/QUOTE]
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Emergency custody order, didn't go as planned.
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