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<blockquote data-quote="KFld" data-source="post: 22566" data-attributes="member: 2442"><p>I remember my difficult child's highschool graduation. We found out he was a heroin addict 2 weeks before and he just got out of his first detox/rehab a few days before graduation. He refused to go and at first it really bothered me that I would not see him walk in his cap and gown. The difference was he did graduate, just didn't go to the ceremony, so we just had his graduation party the same night and celebrated that he made it. </p><p>I know it's different for you because you don't think he's going to graduate, but this one of many things that we have to learn to get over when we have a difficult child. We have a vision of what our lives will be like when our kids are born. The graduations, the weddings, family outings together, and many of these things become nightmares and we truley mourn the loss of them. </p><p></p><p>It took me a long time to stop looking back at what should have been and looking forward to what he can now make of his life. I think I do pretty good with it, but there are times I really thing back to how things should have been. It's normal, we all do it and we all find different ways to get past it. I think because you are living in it now, it's hardest. The things you think will bother you forever that you have missed, do get easier with time.</p><p></p><p>I'm glad you guys don't cover for him with the school. He needs to suffer the consequences of his choices and your covering up for him would only prolong that process.</p><p></p><p>Your doing a good job!!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="KFld, post: 22566, member: 2442"] I remember my difficult child's highschool graduation. We found out he was a heroin addict 2 weeks before and he just got out of his first detox/rehab a few days before graduation. He refused to go and at first it really bothered me that I would not see him walk in his cap and gown. The difference was he did graduate, just didn't go to the ceremony, so we just had his graduation party the same night and celebrated that he made it. I know it's different for you because you don't think he's going to graduate, but this one of many things that we have to learn to get over when we have a difficult child. We have a vision of what our lives will be like when our kids are born. The graduations, the weddings, family outings together, and many of these things become nightmares and we truley mourn the loss of them. It took me a long time to stop looking back at what should have been and looking forward to what he can now make of his life. I think I do pretty good with it, but there are times I really thing back to how things should have been. It's normal, we all do it and we all find different ways to get past it. I think because you are living in it now, it's hardest. The things you think will bother you forever that you have missed, do get easier with time. I'm glad you guys don't cover for him with the school. He needs to suffer the consequences of his choices and your covering up for him would only prolong that process. Your doing a good job!! [/QUOTE]
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