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Estrangement
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 726202" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>The others have given you wonderful advice. I am sorry that you are going through this. Addiction is a gift that infects the entire family even though only one person uses the substance in many cases. The rest just get the behaviors. </p><p></p><p>I do want to point out something. Relapse is incredibly common. Without active work on sobriety, relapse from meth use while being around active meth users is almost unheard of. Even if your son truly was clean for 10 years, clean of ALL substances, just living in and around meth users would be more than enough to push him into meth use. It would be for the majority of meth addicts. Your son wasn't clean, he was in active addiction to very concentrated THC at the very least. </p><p></p><p>Kicking your son out did NOT NOT NOT cause him to live with meth users and start to use meth. His CHOICES caused him to start doing this. He CHOSE that place to live. He CHOSE to behave atrociously to you and to your SO. He CHOSE the house with the meth addicts rather than to go somewhere else. He CHOSE addiction rather than to get clean. HE CHOSE. </p><p></p><p>You did not. Now it is time for you to choose. Choose yourself. Choose to demand to not be abused by him. He has shown that he can find his way out of the cold. It is time for you to choose yourself and your other children. They deserve that as much as you do. Read the books suggested, go to 12 step groups, get a therapist who makes sense to you. If the therapist tells you that you must give your son another chance in your home, get a new therapist. They are not all the right fit. Changing your behavior isn't easy, but you are a strong lady and I think you can do it. After all, you have come this far!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 726202, member: 1233"] The others have given you wonderful advice. I am sorry that you are going through this. Addiction is a gift that infects the entire family even though only one person uses the substance in many cases. The rest just get the behaviors. I do want to point out something. Relapse is incredibly common. Without active work on sobriety, relapse from meth use while being around active meth users is almost unheard of. Even if your son truly was clean for 10 years, clean of ALL substances, just living in and around meth users would be more than enough to push him into meth use. It would be for the majority of meth addicts. Your son wasn't clean, he was in active addiction to very concentrated THC at the very least. Kicking your son out did NOT NOT NOT cause him to live with meth users and start to use meth. His CHOICES caused him to start doing this. He CHOSE that place to live. He CHOSE to behave atrociously to you and to your SO. He CHOSE the house with the meth addicts rather than to go somewhere else. He CHOSE addiction rather than to get clean. HE CHOSE. You did not. Now it is time for you to choose. Choose yourself. Choose to demand to not be abused by him. He has shown that he can find his way out of the cold. It is time for you to choose yourself and your other children. They deserve that as much as you do. Read the books suggested, go to 12 step groups, get a therapist who makes sense to you. If the therapist tells you that you must give your son another chance in your home, get a new therapist. They are not all the right fit. Changing your behavior isn't easy, but you are a strong lady and I think you can do it. After all, you have come this far! [/QUOTE]
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