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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 643652" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>That's my star. It means "Cheers!" lol.</p><p></p><p>I have a lot of insight. I always did. At age six I remember thinking, "I'm different. Why am I different? What's wrong with me?" I also remember thinking "This family is not a normal family." And I was looking up mental health diagnoses in the Encyclopedia Britannica (remember them?) when I was thirteen. When I knew something was "off" I would go on a crusade of my own to try to find out what it was and to perhaps be able to make it better for me. I had no support or help. I simply had myself. And I was always a deep thinker. This and the therapy helped me "see" very early what my family was. Letting go and not blaming myself for what I was accused of...those took much longer. I was almost fifty by the time I realized that my mother's cruelty was about her own self, not me. </p><p></p><p>I still like to ruminate, think, mull, look up info. It doesn't make me sad. Nothing is more interesting to me than human behavior, and it has really been helpful that I have wanted to learn so much. I am also grateful that I have the ability to take good advice and not feel guilty about putting it into action. This all helped me not ony become a better, more balanced person, but a good parent. I know I was that. </p><p></p><p>I am sorry it took you longer, but you got there. We are sisters, in a way, sharing all and, without any anger or jealousy, enjoying our triumphs and sympathizing with one another's tribulations. I value the relationship.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 643652, member: 1550"] That's my star. It means "Cheers!" lol. I have a lot of insight. I always did. At age six I remember thinking, "I'm different. Why am I different? What's wrong with me?" I also remember thinking "This family is not a normal family." And I was looking up mental health diagnoses in the Encyclopedia Britannica (remember them?) when I was thirteen. When I knew something was "off" I would go on a crusade of my own to try to find out what it was and to perhaps be able to make it better for me. I had no support or help. I simply had myself. And I was always a deep thinker. This and the therapy helped me "see" very early what my family was. Letting go and not blaming myself for what I was accused of...those took much longer. I was almost fifty by the time I realized that my mother's cruelty was about her own self, not me. I still like to ruminate, think, mull, look up info. It doesn't make me sad. Nothing is more interesting to me than human behavior, and it has really been helpful that I have wanted to learn so much. I am also grateful that I have the ability to take good advice and not feel guilty about putting it into action. This all helped me not ony become a better, more balanced person, but a good parent. I know I was that. I am sorry it took you longer, but you got there. We are sisters, in a way, sharing all and, without any anger or jealousy, enjoying our triumphs and sympathizing with one another's tribulations. I value the relationship. [/QUOTE]
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