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Family of Origin
Family of Origin issues / Parenting
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<blockquote data-quote="greenrene" data-source="post: 619113" data-attributes="member: 9177"><p>My family of origin was/is very dysfunctional - my mother has undiagnosed mental issues and major anxiety. Her anxiety is such that she can't function normally - she can't drive, etc. She is also entitled, narcissistic, jealous, and overbearing. She has a hard time controlling her temper and was very emotionally abusive to my sister and me growing up. My dad is the classic codependent, very kind and loving, but failed on many levels to protect us from our mother. On top of that, I grew up in a fundamentalist sect of Christianity that has one foot in the "cult" category and was totally immersed in that world, even more so from 5th grade on when I started attending a school run by that group. Anyhoo...</p><p></p><p>I grew up hating my mother and very protective of my father - she was a bully toward him as well. She has mellowed some with age and without kids in the house, but the huge anxiety is still there, she is still very controlling towards my father, and he continues to be codependent. They are also borderline hoarders. </p><p></p><p>My difficult child, while not my bio child, reminds me of my mother in SO many ways, from the temper to the social awkwardness to the bullying. It's been hard to grow up with a difficult child mom and then have a very similar difficult child kid to raise. My overall health and wellness have greatly suffered due to the stress of raising difficult child, especially in recent years. Having her out of my house, getting a therapist for myself, and working on self-improvement have been very good for me.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="greenrene, post: 619113, member: 9177"] My family of origin was/is very dysfunctional - my mother has undiagnosed mental issues and major anxiety. Her anxiety is such that she can't function normally - she can't drive, etc. She is also entitled, narcissistic, jealous, and overbearing. She has a hard time controlling her temper and was very emotionally abusive to my sister and me growing up. My dad is the classic codependent, very kind and loving, but failed on many levels to protect us from our mother. On top of that, I grew up in a fundamentalist sect of Christianity that has one foot in the "cult" category and was totally immersed in that world, even more so from 5th grade on when I started attending a school run by that group. Anyhoo... I grew up hating my mother and very protective of my father - she was a bully toward him as well. She has mellowed some with age and without kids in the house, but the huge anxiety is still there, she is still very controlling towards my father, and he continues to be codependent. They are also borderline hoarders. My difficult child, while not my bio child, reminds me of my mother in SO many ways, from the temper to the social awkwardness to the bullying. It's been hard to grow up with a difficult child mom and then have a very similar difficult child kid to raise. My overall health and wellness have greatly suffered due to the stress of raising difficult child, especially in recent years. Having her out of my house, getting a therapist for myself, and working on self-improvement have been very good for me. [/QUOTE]
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