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Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
Feel like there is more than addiction
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<blockquote data-quote="toughlovin" data-source="post: 743914" data-attributes="member: 15801"><p>Oh Trying..... I am sorry. I know how hard this is I have been through this so many many times. It is heartbreaking. I really hope you can find a good parents alanon meeting....for me that has been the single most important thing that has helped me figure out how to live my life for me at least a good part of the time, if not always.</p><p></p><p>You cannot take this personally. This is about him and his addiction. He is not doing this to you, or to disappoint you, or anything to do with you. He is doing this because he is addicted to alcohol and is not ready to give it up yet....he may think he is, he may at moments be ready to, and so at moments he may be telling you the truth for the moment.... but then the addiction takes over and he loses all resolve. That is the addiction which is stronger than everything else right now.</p><p></p><p>I get your anger, frustration and disgust. I really do. I feel that a lot of the time with my son too. I am not sure those things really help him though. Getting clear on your boundaries are good.... detachment is good but ultimately he has to figure this out and you cant do this for him. You really can’t as much as you want to.</p><p></p><p>TL</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="toughlovin, post: 743914, member: 15801"] Oh Trying..... I am sorry. I know how hard this is I have been through this so many many times. It is heartbreaking. I really hope you can find a good parents alanon meeting....for me that has been the single most important thing that has helped me figure out how to live my life for me at least a good part of the time, if not always. You cannot take this personally. This is about him and his addiction. He is not doing this to you, or to disappoint you, or anything to do with you. He is doing this because he is addicted to alcohol and is not ready to give it up yet....he may think he is, he may at moments be ready to, and so at moments he may be telling you the truth for the moment.... but then the addiction takes over and he loses all resolve. That is the addiction which is stronger than everything else right now. I get your anger, frustration and disgust. I really do. I feel that a lot of the time with my son too. I am not sure those things really help him though. Getting clear on your boundaries are good.... detachment is good but ultimately he has to figure this out and you cant do this for him. You really can’t as much as you want to. TL [/QUOTE]
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Feel like there is more than addiction
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