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Feeling a little sad
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<blockquote data-quote="JMom" data-source="post: 757633" data-attributes="member: 19892"><p>Good evening Beta,</p><p>I am relieved that you had a nice goodbye with Josh. As far as detaching, I think it is good to do with love, for your mental wellness. Perhaps you could tell him that you are proud that he has taken a step to care for himself and that you are going to take sometime away to work on your health, happiness and allowing him to live in peace. Your husband already told him about the money, so a simple "my answer is a no" should be sufficient-no explanation needed.</p><p>I think detaching is the hardest part. We worry so much about what will happen if we are not there to guide them. What likely will happen is that they will make mistakes, learn from them and gain strength, ability, critical thinking skills and confidence. Addicts and people with mental health issues take longer to get out of the nest, but he has made the first step. Please take this time to focus on YOU and your husband. Finances, buying a new home and moving is enough to drive anyone crazy without worrying about Josh. He's young and has more time, energy and ability to take care of himself than you do.</p><p>Take a bubble bath, walk your home and say goodbye to memories you need to. A new home brings new opportunities to decorate, spend time alone with your husband and create some new experiences. I agree with you-let the phone go to voicemail. Josh's requests can wait a day or two. Perhaps end him a care package or a house warming gift.</p><p>I know you love Josh dearly and haven't given up hope. Just prepare in advance for your good will to not be received well. That's OK too, it doesn't take away from the kind gesture on your part.</p><p>Guys always need bathroom soap and hand towels.</p><p></p><p>Hope this helps! Love ya!</p><p>JMOM</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="JMom, post: 757633, member: 19892"] Good evening Beta, I am relieved that you had a nice goodbye with Josh. As far as detaching, I think it is good to do with love, for your mental wellness. Perhaps you could tell him that you are proud that he has taken a step to care for himself and that you are going to take sometime away to work on your health, happiness and allowing him to live in peace. Your husband already told him about the money, so a simple "my answer is a no" should be sufficient-no explanation needed. I think detaching is the hardest part. We worry so much about what will happen if we are not there to guide them. What likely will happen is that they will make mistakes, learn from them and gain strength, ability, critical thinking skills and confidence. Addicts and people with mental health issues take longer to get out of the nest, but he has made the first step. Please take this time to focus on YOU and your husband. Finances, buying a new home and moving is enough to drive anyone crazy without worrying about Josh. He's young and has more time, energy and ability to take care of himself than you do. Take a bubble bath, walk your home and say goodbye to memories you need to. A new home brings new opportunities to decorate, spend time alone with your husband and create some new experiences. I agree with you-let the phone go to voicemail. Josh's requests can wait a day or two. Perhaps end him a care package or a house warming gift. I know you love Josh dearly and haven't given up hope. Just prepare in advance for your good will to not be received well. That's OK too, it doesn't take away from the kind gesture on your part. Guys always need bathroom soap and hand towels. Hope this helps! Love ya! JMOM [/QUOTE]
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