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<blockquote data-quote="Wish" data-source="post: 738380" data-attributes="member: 23140"><p>Hi Mcdonna, I am not really familiar with your situation. No, you can't fix her nor should you really try if she flat refuses to admit she has a problem. How can you fix someone who doesn't even admit they have a problem? It's impossible. That's why I answered OP's question the way that I did because she was asking, in essence, how much she should help him and that's why I said, if one day, If he starts getting serious about getting help and starts making great effort to do so, then maybe she can start helping him.</p><p></p><p>My daughter is 21 and has made grade efforts to take care of herself and her mental illness as best as she can. Even at her worst, she started working at 15 and still works very hard to this day. She actively seeks out therapy and goes once a week for two years now. She does yoga. Spiritual healing. Crystal healing. She gets involved in different hobbies and activities. She does this all in the name of trying to be mentally well. Words can't even describe how proud of I am of this young lady. Most people her age do not take mental illness seriously if they have one and even if they did, they don't try as hard as she does to care for it. From 12 years old to 18 years old, she was a very different person than she is now. I never gave up on her. I fought every bloody demon she had along with her and believe me, those demons were fierce. It was an absolute nightmare for her and myself those years but she did make it. She did overcome it. Something a lot of people never thought she would do which is another reason why I am so beamingly proud of this young lady.</p><p></p><p>My being older and knowing how hard it is to live with mental illness, I do help her <em><u>when I can</u></em> to make her life a little easier which is not very often and she rarely ever asks me to. Is she perfect all the time? Heck no. Of course she sitll has quite a few hiccups. But as long as she is trying, I will never stop helping her so long as I can and am able to help her. I really don't help her much anyways. She pays all of her own bills. She has her own life. But yes, I do things for her once in a while without her asking to try to help her because I know how hard it is for her and again she never asks me to, I just do it on my own because I know how crucial support is for mentally ill people. As I said, mental illness is just as serious as any physical disease. Yes, is up to an individual to get themselves help? Of course. Is up to them to do it on their own if no one is willing to help. Also of course. But that doesn't mean that they should <strong><em><u>have</u></em></strong> to do it alone, when they are making such a great effort as my daughter is.I'm her family. She is mine.</p><p></p><p>So yeah, that is all I meant. If Overcomes mom sees a great effort being made on sons part and can tell without doubt that he is just not lying to her or gaslighting her which would mean her son would have a lot to prove and a long time to prove it, she could help if she wants to or she doesn't have to at all. It's all up to her. I was just simply answering her question posted <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /> But even with the help, you can't fix your child or anyone else for that matter, which is why I never used the word fix. You simply cannot fix anyone.</p><p></p><p>::Edited for some grammar errors and some information that I forgot to add::</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Wish, post: 738380, member: 23140"] Hi Mcdonna, I am not really familiar with your situation. No, you can't fix her nor should you really try if she flat refuses to admit she has a problem. How can you fix someone who doesn't even admit they have a problem? It's impossible. That's why I answered OP's question the way that I did because she was asking, in essence, how much she should help him and that's why I said, if one day, If he starts getting serious about getting help and starts making great effort to do so, then maybe she can start helping him. My daughter is 21 and has made grade efforts to take care of herself and her mental illness as best as she can. Even at her worst, she started working at 15 and still works very hard to this day. She actively seeks out therapy and goes once a week for two years now. She does yoga. Spiritual healing. Crystal healing. She gets involved in different hobbies and activities. She does this all in the name of trying to be mentally well. Words can't even describe how proud of I am of this young lady. Most people her age do not take mental illness seriously if they have one and even if they did, they don't try as hard as she does to care for it. From 12 years old to 18 years old, she was a very different person than she is now. I never gave up on her. I fought every bloody demon she had along with her and believe me, those demons were fierce. It was an absolute nightmare for her and myself those years but she did make it. She did overcome it. Something a lot of people never thought she would do which is another reason why I am so beamingly proud of this young lady. My being older and knowing how hard it is to live with mental illness, I do help her [I][U]when I can[/U][/I] to make her life a little easier which is not very often and she rarely ever asks me to. Is she perfect all the time? Heck no. Of course she sitll has quite a few hiccups. But as long as she is trying, I will never stop helping her so long as I can and am able to help her. I really don't help her much anyways. She pays all of her own bills. She has her own life. But yes, I do things for her once in a while without her asking to try to help her because I know how hard it is for her and again she never asks me to, I just do it on my own because I know how crucial support is for mentally ill people. As I said, mental illness is just as serious as any physical disease. Yes, is up to an individual to get themselves help? Of course. Is up to them to do it on their own if no one is willing to help. Also of course. But that doesn't mean that they should [B][I][U]have[/U][/I][/B] to do it alone, when they are making such a great effort as my daughter is.I'm her family. She is mine. So yeah, that is all I meant. If Overcomes mom sees a great effort being made on sons part and can tell without doubt that he is just not lying to her or gaslighting her which would mean her son would have a lot to prove and a long time to prove it, she could help if she wants to or she doesn't have to at all. It's all up to her. I was just simply answering her question posted :) But even with the help, you can't fix your child or anyone else for that matter, which is why I never used the word fix. You simply cannot fix anyone. ::Edited for some grammar errors and some information that I forgot to add:: [/QUOTE]
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