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<blockquote data-quote="overcome mom" data-source="post: 738395" data-attributes="member: 23328"><p>Thank you for all the sage advice. I just spoke to my son's wife ( she got out from being locked up) to hear what she would say. I have a pretty good BS detector. She has lied in the past so I take everything with skepticism. I asked her if he was using and she said yes. Asked why he has lost the last 7 jobs and she said for the most part that he was never on time and was very unorganized. The way she described the night they went to jail it sounded like he was out of control. She didn't take much responsibility. What I got out of talking with her is that I am glad I did not bail him out. Hopefully he can dry out and come to a little bit of a realization. He had stopped using before but like most people with drug addictions started up again when stress got to much. I have talked with my husband about getting a whole house security system because I have a feeling when he gets out he will try and come home and it will turn bad when he doesn't get the money he wants. He has broken in and stolen from us about 6-7 years ago. He becomes very aggressive when he feels cornered. I try to placate him for the moment but his Dad feels he needs to stand his ground and will not back down. I would rather just get him out of here and then do something to prevent his return than to have things turn violent. I know he will feel he has lost everything so he will come after me. I hate feeling scared. Just trying to hold strong, this forum has helped. It does help to hear about people's whose children have turned the corner. Hope is always a good thing.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="overcome mom, post: 738395, member: 23328"] Thank you for all the sage advice. I just spoke to my son's wife ( she got out from being locked up) to hear what she would say. I have a pretty good BS detector. She has lied in the past so I take everything with skepticism. I asked her if he was using and she said yes. Asked why he has lost the last 7 jobs and she said for the most part that he was never on time and was very unorganized. The way she described the night they went to jail it sounded like he was out of control. She didn't take much responsibility. What I got out of talking with her is that I am glad I did not bail him out. Hopefully he can dry out and come to a little bit of a realization. He had stopped using before but like most people with drug addictions started up again when stress got to much. I have talked with my husband about getting a whole house security system because I have a feeling when he gets out he will try and come home and it will turn bad when he doesn't get the money he wants. He has broken in and stolen from us about 6-7 years ago. He becomes very aggressive when he feels cornered. I try to placate him for the moment but his Dad feels he needs to stand his ground and will not back down. I would rather just get him out of here and then do something to prevent his return than to have things turn violent. I know he will feel he has lost everything so he will come after me. I hate feeling scared. Just trying to hold strong, this forum has helped. It does help to hear about people's whose children have turned the corner. Hope is always a good thing. [/QUOTE]
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