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Feeling Sad---Son is Homeless
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<blockquote data-quote="Feeling Sad" data-source="post: 668386" data-attributes="member: 19245"><p>Cedar, what a true gift! I came home from a difficult day at school to find all of you kind words, quotes, and thoughtful suggestions. Boy, I can't believe that you went back so far... Thank you, so much. I plan to reread your posts to glean all of the help from them. I truly appreciate your time.</p><p></p><p>I am going to try to light a candle...symbolic and calming. You are right. We can be so cruel to ourselves. It does not help. I am still, I guess, in shock that it even happened. Your are correct about trying to listen to your tone with your internal dialogue. I usually am blaming myself. Yes, guilt is useless. My guilt is very, very slowly going away. I am trying to forgive myself. I tried my best....and I am slowly starting to believe it, without qualifying the statement.</p><p></p><p>I stopped seeing the severe therapist. She seemed disappointed in me and I couldn't justify paying to lie to her. If I told the truth...she would look at me like I had failed in some large measure.</p><p></p><p>I just got approved to see the kinder therapists for 10 more sessions and then, that's it. Hopefully, I will be better by then. </p><p></p><p>Last night, I had another scare. I received a parking ticket for my ill son 3 hours away down South from here. My biggest fear is that he will leave the area. He is very delusional and I feel better knowing that he is somewhat local. I called the bank because he does not have a card and it just says; teller withdrawal. I tell them that, someone stole my card information once, true story, and they give me the bank locations. They tell me that because they are teller withdrawals, they have to show i.d. I just play dumb and they give me the locations. Thankfully, he is still local. He just went on a short trip. Now that I am more relaxed...I am happy for him.</p><p></p><p>Without this site, I could not even imagine what state of mind I would be in. This site is great...actual real-life insight into your problems from many caring knowledgeable people that have gone, or are going, through the same dilemmas.</p><p></p><p>We have each others' backs. I have never had such wonderful friends...nonjudgmental open caring friends. May our children feel our combined strength and love! Thank you!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Feeling Sad, post: 668386, member: 19245"] Cedar, what a true gift! I came home from a difficult day at school to find all of you kind words, quotes, and thoughtful suggestions. Boy, I can't believe that you went back so far... Thank you, so much. I plan to reread your posts to glean all of the help from them. I truly appreciate your time. I am going to try to light a candle...symbolic and calming. You are right. We can be so cruel to ourselves. It does not help. I am still, I guess, in shock that it even happened. Your are correct about trying to listen to your tone with your internal dialogue. I usually am blaming myself. Yes, guilt is useless. My guilt is very, very slowly going away. I am trying to forgive myself. I tried my best....and I am slowly starting to believe it, without qualifying the statement. I stopped seeing the severe therapist. She seemed disappointed in me and I couldn't justify paying to lie to her. If I told the truth...she would look at me like I had failed in some large measure. I just got approved to see the kinder therapists for 10 more sessions and then, that's it. Hopefully, I will be better by then. Last night, I had another scare. I received a parking ticket for my ill son 3 hours away down South from here. My biggest fear is that he will leave the area. He is very delusional and I feel better knowing that he is somewhat local. I called the bank because he does not have a card and it just says; teller withdrawal. I tell them that, someone stole my card information once, true story, and they give me the bank locations. They tell me that because they are teller withdrawals, they have to show i.d. I just play dumb and they give me the locations. Thankfully, he is still local. He just went on a short trip. Now that I am more relaxed...I am happy for him. Without this site, I could not even imagine what state of mind I would be in. This site is great...actual real-life insight into your problems from many caring knowledgeable people that have gone, or are going, through the same dilemmas. We have each others' backs. I have never had such wonderful friends...nonjudgmental open caring friends. May our children feel our combined strength and love! Thank you! [/QUOTE]
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