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Feeling Sad---Son is Homeless
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<blockquote data-quote="wisernow" data-source="post: 706380" data-attributes="member: 20373"><p>Please do. I share much with you including your grief. My son was diagnosed as schizophrenic 2 years ago after 8 years of spiraling out of control and not diagnosed. Add to that drug issues, violence issues, and having him removed from our home. Thankfully he is currently treatment compliant and living in a group home but it took having him criminally charged with assault, convicted and placed on probation for the messaging to finally get to him that he needs to be treated, and he needs to stay off the drugs. He is 28 and is on three years of probation. I hope he keeps with the plan, but the roller coaster continues and I wait for the other shoe to drop. I have had to do a lot of work on myself over the past few years to basically keep breathing. Interestingly when I was finally able to give in to the grief, accept the fact that life was not how I had planned, I started to change. I take very good care of myself now. Will the relationship with him ever be the same? No. But then when I think about it, after he became an adolescent the relationship was not really that good anyhow. All I can hope is that we do small building blocks on his time and my time.</p><p></p><p>Your son may one day realize he needs to be treated , may well become stable and open to having a relationship. Right now you are fighting a demon (the mental illness) which you have absolutely no control over. Please be kind to yourself . Through the worst times of my grief my therapist said to me"allow yourself 10 minutes to cry, rage, relive pain etc and then force yourself to move on". At first it was hard, but through a lot of discipline I can do that. and there are actually days I don't cry or rage anymore. Hugs Hugs Hugs!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="wisernow, post: 706380, member: 20373"] Please do. I share much with you including your grief. My son was diagnosed as schizophrenic 2 years ago after 8 years of spiraling out of control and not diagnosed. Add to that drug issues, violence issues, and having him removed from our home. Thankfully he is currently treatment compliant and living in a group home but it took having him criminally charged with assault, convicted and placed on probation for the messaging to finally get to him that he needs to be treated, and he needs to stay off the drugs. He is 28 and is on three years of probation. I hope he keeps with the plan, but the roller coaster continues and I wait for the other shoe to drop. I have had to do a lot of work on myself over the past few years to basically keep breathing. Interestingly when I was finally able to give in to the grief, accept the fact that life was not how I had planned, I started to change. I take very good care of myself now. Will the relationship with him ever be the same? No. But then when I think about it, after he became an adolescent the relationship was not really that good anyhow. All I can hope is that we do small building blocks on his time and my time. Your son may one day realize he needs to be treated , may well become stable and open to having a relationship. Right now you are fighting a demon (the mental illness) which you have absolutely no control over. Please be kind to yourself . Through the worst times of my grief my therapist said to me"allow yourself 10 minutes to cry, rage, relive pain etc and then force yourself to move on". At first it was hard, but through a lot of discipline I can do that. and there are actually days I don't cry or rage anymore. Hugs Hugs Hugs! [/QUOTE]
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