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Feeling Sad---Son is Homeless
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<blockquote data-quote="New Leaf" data-source="post: 748392" data-attributes="member: 19522"><p>Hi Feeling,Copa, RN and anyone following along. Yes, I have been MIA here on CD, my apologies, life has gotten extremely busy with Son graduating and making college plans. </p><p>Your trip sounds wonderful Feeling, you are one brave soul going out into the wide world! Copa, wow traveling the seas on container ships, that sounds super adventurous. More down to earth than a conventional cruise. The ship workers on board would be an interesting folk to meet. I am basically a hermit, preferring to stay close to the home front, for now. I am not that adventurous except for my paddling escapades. RN, so glad to hear your son is making a go of conventional living and bless you for being here and offering hope to others.</p><p>I have been treading water so to speak since the mystery illness in December and the ensuing exhaustion. I am slowly rebuilding and am finding more energy. </p><p>Got whammied again this past weekend with hubs Mom passing and reports of Rain hospitalized with <em>gulp </em>sepsis, she left against doctors recommendations. It has been quite some time since I have seen her. So, long story short, went to the park and found her and begged her to go back to the hospital, which she refused saying she had “made her choice.” She is to go to a clinic and check on her wound, which she calls park rot, aka cellulitis, or deep tissue infection. Her sister offered to take her in for a few days, so at least she could rest and shower. She refused that as well saying that she would be worried about her <em>things</em>. </p><p><img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite12" alt="o_O" title="Er... what? o_O" loading="lazy" data-shortname="o_O" /></p><p>One caveat to the whole ordeal is that she is in contact with a social worker who is helping her get her essential paperwork. Son cancelled his plans and came along which brought back some intense memories for him. He said that he cannot take the stress of it, especially with all he has to prepare for.</p><p>I am in that kind of numb daze that enables me to function. You know, like auto pilot. I am saddened by her situation and choices, fearful that she may not pull through, yet accepting that I cannot change her mind or move her to take better care of herself. Well, <em>kind</em> of accepting because to be else-wise is the end of <em>my</em> being. So I teeter totter between the edge of wanting to scream my bloody lungs out yet maintaining a calm zen like exterior. </p><p>That’s hard work in of itself and I <em>know</em> you all <em>know</em> what I am talking about. </p><p>She will be 40 this year. I have to accept that her lifestyle is conducive to ailing health and perhaps untimely passing. Sigh. What is one to do?</p><p> Pray, lots and lots of prayer.</p><p>Tornado is back in jail. She was caught with meth and drug paraphernalia. Complained to me that the police roughed her up pretty bad. I don’t find it surprising, she is quick with her mouth. I am not condoning that sort of thing, but as Son and I discussed that if one places themselves in that environment the chances of an altercation are greater. I don’t know how long she will be in, went through a week of her saying she was getting out on a plea and that she needed to come home (again the manipulation). I wobbled in my thought process, actually considering it for a nano second or two, then realized how truly impossible that is. She claims that rehabs are full (true), there are waiting lists. But, there are other places to go. We shall see how that pans out. She is enrolled in a court program called Hope that has more intense monitoring with probation. Only time will tell what she chooses.</p><p>Oh guys, I just totally hijacked this thread. It just came spilling out on my keyboard. It has all been pent up, not lunch conversation for sure and my well children are tired of hearing the same old same old.</p><p>Sometimes I feel like I am trapped in a Twilight Zone episode, one bizarre occurrence after another. It’s like a recurring nightmare. Am I to live with this until I react correctly, emotionally and physically?</p><p>Definitely have to get back to my morning walks. That helped to sift all this through a logical Star Trek Spock mind. </p><p>It is what it is.</p><p>Deal with it.</p><p>Float, float on.</p><p>One day at a time.</p><p>Sigh.</p><p>Love to all.</p><p>Oh Feeling I am so proud of my Little Bird escaping the cage.</p><p>You go girl!</p><p>(((Hugs)))</p><p>Leafy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="New Leaf, post: 748392, member: 19522"] Hi Feeling,Copa, RN and anyone following along. Yes, I have been MIA here on CD, my apologies, life has gotten extremely busy with Son graduating and making college plans. Your trip sounds wonderful Feeling, you are one brave soul going out into the wide world! Copa, wow traveling the seas on container ships, that sounds super adventurous. More down to earth than a conventional cruise. The ship workers on board would be an interesting folk to meet. I am basically a hermit, preferring to stay close to the home front, for now. I am not that adventurous except for my paddling escapades. RN, so glad to hear your son is making a go of conventional living and bless you for being here and offering hope to others. I have been treading water so to speak since the mystery illness in December and the ensuing exhaustion. I am slowly rebuilding and am finding more energy. Got whammied again this past weekend with hubs Mom passing and reports of Rain hospitalized with [I]gulp [/I]sepsis, she left against doctors recommendations. It has been quite some time since I have seen her. So, long story short, went to the park and found her and begged her to go back to the hospital, which she refused saying she had “made her choice.” She is to go to a clinic and check on her wound, which she calls park rot, aka cellulitis, or deep tissue infection. Her sister offered to take her in for a few days, so at least she could rest and shower. She refused that as well saying that she would be worried about her [I]things[/I]. o_O One caveat to the whole ordeal is that she is in contact with a social worker who is helping her get her essential paperwork. Son cancelled his plans and came along which brought back some intense memories for him. He said that he cannot take the stress of it, especially with all he has to prepare for. I am in that kind of numb daze that enables me to function. You know, like auto pilot. I am saddened by her situation and choices, fearful that she may not pull through, yet accepting that I cannot change her mind or move her to take better care of herself. Well, [I]kind[/I] of accepting because to be else-wise is the end of [I]my[/I] being. So I teeter totter between the edge of wanting to scream my bloody lungs out yet maintaining a calm zen like exterior. That’s hard work in of itself and I [I]know[/I] you all [I]know[/I] what I am talking about. She will be 40 this year. I have to accept that her lifestyle is conducive to ailing health and perhaps untimely passing. Sigh. What is one to do? Pray, lots and lots of prayer. Tornado is back in jail. She was caught with meth and drug paraphernalia. Complained to me that the police roughed her up pretty bad. I don’t find it surprising, she is quick with her mouth. I am not condoning that sort of thing, but as Son and I discussed that if one places themselves in that environment the chances of an altercation are greater. I don’t know how long she will be in, went through a week of her saying she was getting out on a plea and that she needed to come home (again the manipulation). I wobbled in my thought process, actually considering it for a nano second or two, then realized how truly impossible that is. She claims that rehabs are full (true), there are waiting lists. But, there are other places to go. We shall see how that pans out. She is enrolled in a court program called Hope that has more intense monitoring with probation. Only time will tell what she chooses. Oh guys, I just totally hijacked this thread. It just came spilling out on my keyboard. It has all been pent up, not lunch conversation for sure and my well children are tired of hearing the same old same old. Sometimes I feel like I am trapped in a Twilight Zone episode, one bizarre occurrence after another. It’s like a recurring nightmare. Am I to live with this until I react correctly, emotionally and physically? Definitely have to get back to my morning walks. That helped to sift all this through a logical Star Trek Spock mind. It is what it is. Deal with it. Float, float on. One day at a time. Sigh. Love to all. Oh Feeling I am so proud of my Little Bird escaping the cage. You go girl! (((Hugs))) Leafy [/QUOTE]
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