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Feeling Sad---Son is Homeless
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 757722" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>Dear Feeling</p><p></p><p>I am glad you posted. It's a start. I can't post at length now but will return later today. This is what I will say now, which is what I think. The largest part of our life is our internal life with our own thoughts and feelings. I believe this is true for most of us. Unfortunately, for those of us with a history of trauma, and yours is nearly lifelong, we can't trust our own feelings and thoughts to give us solace. They are often our harshest tormentors. We wake up terrorized and can't fall asleep, for the same.</p><p></p><p>Right now it seems as if almost everything in your life has become an instrument of terror. And on top of it, Coronavirus. While most people don't have the circumstances you're dealing with, most everybody has something. I read yesterday that alcoholism, addiction, domestic violence and abuse has skyrocketed during the past 3 months.</p><p></p><p>Now that school is winding down you will have time to add activities that could help you. Little things can make a remarkable difference. TheNYT online is always telling us what we can do to help ourselves, in these times. That is because everybody, or almost, is suffering.</p><p></p><p>An online meditation group (on Zoom), an online Art class (The Art Students League in NY City has offerings, as do many California Community Colleges), an online group in spirituality. I know you will balk at each of these, but you have to offer yourself respite. Nobody will do it for you. The issues with middle son are another matter, but you are also need to step out of this battle within yourself. Have you been walking? I guarantee you if you built up to walking 1 hour a day, doing artwork in your room, begin an online correspondence with 2 women across the world, not focused on your children, meditating everyday, establishing a small kitchen garden, even if things were to remain the same, you would change. Churches and synagogues are all meeting online, on Facebook and Zoom. I love it. I also believe in housework. But that may not be possible with your son dominating the house.</p><p></p><p>I recognize you are depressed. Which feels like walking through wet concrete. It's time to be kind to you, Feeling.</p><p></p><p>I will come back later. You are not alone Feeling. Love, Copa</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 757722, member: 18958"] Dear Feeling I am glad you posted. It's a start. I can't post at length now but will return later today. This is what I will say now, which is what I think. The largest part of our life is our internal life with our own thoughts and feelings. I believe this is true for most of us. Unfortunately, for those of us with a history of trauma, and yours is nearly lifelong, we can't trust our own feelings and thoughts to give us solace. They are often our harshest tormentors. We wake up terrorized and can't fall asleep, for the same. Right now it seems as if almost everything in your life has become an instrument of terror. And on top of it, Coronavirus. While most people don't have the circumstances you're dealing with, most everybody has something. I read yesterday that alcoholism, addiction, domestic violence and abuse has skyrocketed during the past 3 months. Now that school is winding down you will have time to add activities that could help you. Little things can make a remarkable difference. TheNYT online is always telling us what we can do to help ourselves, in these times. That is because everybody, or almost, is suffering. An online meditation group (on Zoom), an online Art class (The Art Students League in NY City has offerings, as do many California Community Colleges), an online group in spirituality. I know you will balk at each of these, but you have to offer yourself respite. Nobody will do it for you. The issues with middle son are another matter, but you are also need to step out of this battle within yourself. Have you been walking? I guarantee you if you built up to walking 1 hour a day, doing artwork in your room, begin an online correspondence with 2 women across the world, not focused on your children, meditating everyday, establishing a small kitchen garden, even if things were to remain the same, you would change. Churches and synagogues are all meeting online, on Facebook and Zoom. I love it. I also believe in housework. But that may not be possible with your son dominating the house. I recognize you are depressed. Which feels like walking through wet concrete. It's time to be kind to you, Feeling. I will come back later. You are not alone Feeling. Love, Copa [/QUOTE]
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