I picked husband up at the airport yesterday morning.
He felt visit with son was good. They went to Miami and walked the strip which is what my son has wanted to do. He took him and girlfriend out for a nice steak dinner (my son's favorite) on his birthday. Swam in the ocean, pool etc.
Husband broke down to me last night and cried like a baby. I have only seen this twice in 25 years with him. He said place son is at is a 
hole and like a prison. Son had said it was nicer than last place so I don't get it.
He has been staying at girlfriend's house at times. They can do that as long as they follow rules, go to meetings and drug test comes back clean.
SWOT her father died of a cocaine overdose many years ago. He had his Ph.D so no slouch. Half brother went through addiction but is clean now. She does not drink or do drugs. Why is she with son? She is very overweight but quite pretty and very nice. My son is nice looking and 6'2" and sweet. He treats her nice. So I think that is WHY she is with him. He is not actively using anything. I think to him she is a good friend and they spend a lot of time together. I think she is in love with my son. This is my husband's take on it. Feels she would do anything for son. Yes that is house where he overdosed. She did not help him take the pills from mom's room. HE did that on his own. Her mom is back in hospital again; this time in Miami where there are specialists. I do not know if there are pills there and that is a worry but I can't control it. This girl has had a hard life.
I cannot control what my son does. IF he wants to stay sober he will. If not, then he has to suffer the consequences which I think he is already suffering.
My husband is going back there in October for husband's birthday for a long weekend. His 30 year old son may go also. He wants to guide our son into taking classes at the local college while in sober living after he graduates this program. I have heard that addicts use for a reason. I don't know IF that is true but I think that the father/son relationship has been very broken for a long time so if this is something that helps them both then it is a good thing. My husband is showing emotions I have never seen before and that is a good thing. I think my son was very happy to spend time with his dad and see that he is supporting him emotionally.
I am not controlling any of this. My husband is doing what he wants to do with our son and giving him guidance as a dad. I am continuing to do what I have been doing that helps me deal with it.
