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Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
Fighting the urge to rescue just so I feel better
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<blockquote data-quote="Lost in sadness" data-source="post: 723642" data-attributes="member: 21056"><p>Thank you all. I thought he hit 'rock bottom' when he was in the homeless hostel. Well, he worked hard to get a job etc so he could get out. It is almost as if they forget the mess they were in when things are going well and then end up back where they started. If you met my son you would be surprised. He is good looking, articulate and genuinely has a heart of gold, BUT.... something in him can change in an instant. When I really look at his life, he has no real friends anymore, seems to struggle in relationships with girls, always arguing and will pick a fight in an instant but yet manages to make you feel bad about it. He does not seem to register the truth. He was recently 'diagnosed' with Borderline (BPD) (in 22 minutes) but yet sent away with no help. I suspect he does have this but my husband thinks he has more control than what he demonstrates as he doesn't speak to everyone like a piece of sh*t on his shoe. I think knowing he has this makes things harder as I try to imagine what it must be like in your head with this and I would never want him to feel he has been abandoned which is a Borderline (BPD) fear! I know he feels this. He tells me he was pushed out of the family but yet cannot see this was because of HIS behavior. His vision of it is, he turned like he is BECAUSE of being pushed out. Its a constant battle or arguments as this comes up every time! x</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Lost in sadness, post: 723642, member: 21056"] Thank you all. I thought he hit 'rock bottom' when he was in the homeless hostel. Well, he worked hard to get a job etc so he could get out. It is almost as if they forget the mess they were in when things are going well and then end up back where they started. If you met my son you would be surprised. He is good looking, articulate and genuinely has a heart of gold, BUT.... something in him can change in an instant. When I really look at his life, he has no real friends anymore, seems to struggle in relationships with girls, always arguing and will pick a fight in an instant but yet manages to make you feel bad about it. He does not seem to register the truth. He was recently 'diagnosed' with Borderline (BPD) (in 22 minutes) but yet sent away with no help. I suspect he does have this but my husband thinks he has more control than what he demonstrates as he doesn't speak to everyone like a piece of sh*t on his shoe. I think knowing he has this makes things harder as I try to imagine what it must be like in your head with this and I would never want him to feel he has been abandoned which is a Borderline (BPD) fear! I know he feels this. He tells me he was pushed out of the family but yet cannot see this was because of HIS behavior. His vision of it is, he turned like he is BECAUSE of being pushed out. Its a constant battle or arguments as this comes up every time! x [/QUOTE]
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Fighting the urge to rescue just so I feel better
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