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Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Finding balance between boundaries, freedom, and consequences
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<blockquote data-quote="JayPee" data-source="post: 750056" data-attributes="member: 23405"><p>Welcome,</p><p></p><p>I hope that you take everyone’s advice and be very cautious. This sounds and is very serious. Finding him some good help is definitely a good idea. I recall my youngest son having to take court ordered anger management classes and unfortunately he was angry to have to do that. It was like pulling teeth to get him out of bed and to these scheduled meetings. In fact we were both angry every time I drove him there. It was frustrating and likely not as in depth as to what you’re looking into. He didn’t benefit because he just went thru the motions. My son then got more into drinking and drugs until he decided to join the Marine Corp. we had one very proud year that I will never forget but after being medically discharged all his anger partying and drugs returned along with PTSD and anxiety. </p><p></p><p>I guess in retrospect I wished we had figured out what he needed at 16 years old because now he’s 26 and is homeless, doesn’t work, etc. and disconnected in many ways unable and unwilling to make changes and take care of himself. </p><p></p><p>It doesn’t get easier and once they’re 18 our hands are virtually tied as parents to really have input and or know what’s going on with mental health and the like due to the privacy act. </p><p></p><p>I hope you find him the help he needs and that he’s a willing participant.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="JayPee, post: 750056, member: 23405"] Welcome, I hope that you take everyone’s advice and be very cautious. This sounds and is very serious. Finding him some good help is definitely a good idea. I recall my youngest son having to take court ordered anger management classes and unfortunately he was angry to have to do that. It was like pulling teeth to get him out of bed and to these scheduled meetings. In fact we were both angry every time I drove him there. It was frustrating and likely not as in depth as to what you’re looking into. He didn’t benefit because he just went thru the motions. My son then got more into drinking and drugs until he decided to join the Marine Corp. we had one very proud year that I will never forget but after being medically discharged all his anger partying and drugs returned along with PTSD and anxiety. I guess in retrospect I wished we had figured out what he needed at 16 years old because now he’s 26 and is homeless, doesn’t work, etc. and disconnected in many ways unable and unwilling to make changes and take care of himself. It doesn’t get easier and once they’re 18 our hands are virtually tied as parents to really have input and or know what’s going on with mental health and the like due to the privacy act. I hope you find him the help he needs and that he’s a willing participant. [/QUOTE]
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Finding balance between boundaries, freedom, and consequences
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