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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 602601" data-attributes="member: 1550">Just remember this: You can not control what other people do. They will get tired of him too if he doesn't shape up. Until then, stick to YOUR guns and continue to refuse to let him home unless he shapes up. If Gran and Grandpa want to enable him and support him while he self-destricts, at least he is giving THEM grief, not you. I would put a large distance between yourself and them. But don't waste time wringing your hands over it. You can't do anything about it. I think you should try Narc-Anon. It may not work for everyone, but I found answers there, especially about letting go of trying to control other people and moving on with my own life. You may as well try it. Nobody will even make you speak. But you can listen to the message, which is largely what I said. It is easier to go through a trauma, I think, if you don't feel like you are doing it alone.Hugsssss, Pam <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile&nbsp; &nbsp; :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></blockquote>

[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 602601, member: 1550"] Just remember this: You can not control what other people do. They will get tired of him too if he doesn't shape up. Until then, stick to YOUR guns and continue to refuse to let him home unless he shapes up. If Gran and Grandpa want to enable him and support him while he self-destricts, at least he is giving THEM grief, not you. I would put a large distance between yourself and them. But don't waste time wringing your hands over it. You can't do anything about it. I think you should try Narc-Anon. It may not work for everyone, but I found answers there, especially about letting go of trying to control other people and moving on with my own life. You may as well try it. Nobody will even make you speak. But you can listen to the message, which is largely what I said. It is easier to go through a trauma, I think, if you don't feel like you are doing it alone. Hugsssss, Pam :) [/QUOTE]

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