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He was fired today
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<blockquote data-quote="Childofmine" data-source="post: 623889" data-attributes="member: 17542"><p>Oh Daze, I am so sorry. I can hear your fear and your disappointment. Don't go there, Daze. Don't start thinking about what if, never, always, not going to change. </p><p></p><p>Don't give in to living in the future in your mind, and awfulizing that future. We can't know the future, and what we do when we try, is we never include the pluses and the steps forward and the joys. With our difficult children, we just focus on the "it's always going to be this way."</p><p></p><p>We don't know that Daze. We aren't given that Power.</p><p></p><p>So, feel your feelings, Daze, feel them and cry and rant and do what you have to do. Then, separate yourself from what is going on with him. </p><p></p><p>He will have to figure it out, Daze. And he will, somehow, someway. It won't be like we hoped and dreamed. </p><p></p><p>I am learning (boy I am a SLOW freakin' learner) that many different kinds of people can exist in this world and do okay. It's not about what I believe, my hopes, my "standards" (Ha!), my aspirations. It's about theirs. And theirs are different from mine, and that is the way it is supposed to be.</p><p></p><p>Drive down the road, Daze. Look at all of the different kinds of houses, businesses, stores. Inside them are people making their own way, somehow. Not like we are. Like THEY are. </p><p></p><p>And some, like my son, seem to be making it in jail right now. Or on the street. Okay. It is what it is. I am working so hard to just simply accept that. Not to get in the middle of it and try to save it, fix it, do something with it. It's not mind to do with. </p><p></p><p>Ugh. This is hard, hard stuff, Daze. This is middle of the night stuff. </p><p></p><p>Your son made progress, that is what I am seeing. Is he "there" yet? No. We know he needs to find a job and he will again. I, too, think it is a very positive thing that he is calling the manager and coming clean about his disabilities. </p><p></p><p>Truth-telling. It's always good, Daze. It can't always salvage this situation, but it will build on itself, and something good will come of that, inside him.</p><p></p><p>Let's keep moving forward today, Daze. Let's do the hard work of change within ourselves. That is our job to do.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Childofmine, post: 623889, member: 17542"] Oh Daze, I am so sorry. I can hear your fear and your disappointment. Don't go there, Daze. Don't start thinking about what if, never, always, not going to change. Don't give in to living in the future in your mind, and awfulizing that future. We can't know the future, and what we do when we try, is we never include the pluses and the steps forward and the joys. With our difficult children, we just focus on the "it's always going to be this way." We don't know that Daze. We aren't given that Power. So, feel your feelings, Daze, feel them and cry and rant and do what you have to do. Then, separate yourself from what is going on with him. He will have to figure it out, Daze. And he will, somehow, someway. It won't be like we hoped and dreamed. I am learning (boy I am a SLOW freakin' learner) that many different kinds of people can exist in this world and do okay. It's not about what I believe, my hopes, my "standards" (Ha!), my aspirations. It's about theirs. And theirs are different from mine, and that is the way it is supposed to be. Drive down the road, Daze. Look at all of the different kinds of houses, businesses, stores. Inside them are people making their own way, somehow. Not like we are. Like THEY are. And some, like my son, seem to be making it in jail right now. Or on the street. Okay. It is what it is. I am working so hard to just simply accept that. Not to get in the middle of it and try to save it, fix it, do something with it. It's not mind to do with. Ugh. This is hard, hard stuff, Daze. This is middle of the night stuff. Your son made progress, that is what I am seeing. Is he "there" yet? No. We know he needs to find a job and he will again. I, too, think it is a very positive thing that he is calling the manager and coming clean about his disabilities. Truth-telling. It's always good, Daze. It can't always salvage this situation, but it will build on itself, and something good will come of that, inside him. Let's keep moving forward today, Daze. Let's do the hard work of change within ourselves. That is our job to do. [/QUOTE]
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