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<blockquote data-quote="savior no more" data-source="post: 686620" data-attributes="member: 19838"><p>the only way I got my son to quit tearing my house up - breaking windows, doors, threatening me - was to call the police when he started doing this. It was hard but it set the firm boundary with him that I would not tolerate this. They also talked to him about his anger and tried to help him with services that were available. I must admit that the way I gained courage to do this was from my new boyfriend at the time giving me encouragement which felt a lot like controlling. I had become so insulated to the abuse that I didn't even know it was abusive. It took an outsider to help me see it for what it was. I recently allowed my son to slip back into smashing a wall in - he said he did it in his sleep, come on now - and I bought it. I also let him get away with stealing from my house and not calling the cops on him. At that point I'm sure they were thinking, " lady why did you bail him out."</p><p> It's easy for people to tell you what you need to do, but until you have the strength and support to carry through, It's hard to break free from abusive situations. I second the suggestion to get help through the domestic abuse support group. I'm glad you found us - I have been there and it's been a long road out but so worth it for the peace.</p></blockquote><p>[/QUOTE]</p>
[QUOTE="savior no more, post: 686620, member: 19838"] the only way I got my son to quit tearing my house up - breaking windows, doors, threatening me - was to call the police when he started doing this. It was hard but it set the firm boundary with him that I would not tolerate this. They also talked to him about his anger and tried to help him with services that were available. I must admit that the way I gained courage to do this was from my new boyfriend at the time giving me encouragement which felt a lot like controlling. I had become so insulated to the abuse that I didn't even know it was abusive. It took an outsider to help me see it for what it was. I recently allowed my son to slip back into smashing a wall in - he said he did it in his sleep, come on now - and I bought it. I also let him get away with stealing from my house and not calling the cops on him. At that point I'm sure they were thinking, " lady why did you bail him out." It's easy for people to tell you what you need to do, but until you have the strength and support to carry through, It's hard to break free from abusive situations. I second the suggestion to get help through the domestic abuse support group. I'm glad you found us - I have been there and it's been a long road out but so worth it for the peace.[/QUOTE] [/QUOTE]
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