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He's been kicked out of the shelter
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<blockquote data-quote="Lil" data-source="post: 644113" data-attributes="member: 17309"><p>Actually, I think we do this in large part. When he got kicked out of the shelter, we did our level best to get him to see that it wasn't anyone else's fault and, more importantly, that he had to figure out what to do because no matter the reason he got kicked out, the situation was what it was.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p>That's pretty much exactly how I'm trying to look at this. I told Jabber, I want this to be like when he had his student loans and was in "college". He was living his own life and we didn't get phone calls constantly about his problems. I would sent a text once every week or two asking if he was okay. He'd say he was. Life went on.</p><p> </p><p>Last night at 9 Jabber made a remark about how the night had gotten away from us. I said, "I'm just glad it's 9 and we haven't gotten a phone call. Won't it be nice when we stop expecting a phone call?"</p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p>I like this. And really, I don't see the apartment as enabling. I don't resent it. Yes, he should have planned better while he was at the shelter. Yes, he should not have gotten kicked out of the shelter. But regardless, he was in a situation that he could not get out of by himself and still keep his job. His choice...his only choice...was to quit so he could cold-cot at the shelter.</p><p> </p><p>Now, buying food again, paying any other bills, etc., that would be different and we're not doing that. At this point he has everything he needs to succeed. All we can do is hope he does. If not? Well, that's June. <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/unsure.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":unsure:" title="unsure :unsure:" data-shortname=":unsure:" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Lil, post: 644113, member: 17309"] Actually, I think we do this in large part. When he got kicked out of the shelter, we did our level best to get him to see that it wasn't anyone else's fault and, more importantly, that he had to figure out what to do because no matter the reason he got kicked out, the situation was what it was. That's pretty much exactly how I'm trying to look at this. I told Jabber, I want this to be like when he had his student loans and was in "college". He was living his own life and we didn't get phone calls constantly about his problems. I would sent a text once every week or two asking if he was okay. He'd say he was. Life went on. Last night at 9 Jabber made a remark about how the night had gotten away from us. I said, "I'm just glad it's 9 and we haven't gotten a phone call. Won't it be nice when we stop expecting a phone call?" I like this. And really, I don't see the apartment as enabling. I don't resent it. Yes, he should have planned better while he was at the shelter. Yes, he should not have gotten kicked out of the shelter. But regardless, he was in a situation that he could not get out of by himself and still keep his job. His choice...his only choice...was to quit so he could cold-cot at the shelter. Now, buying food again, paying any other bills, etc., that would be different and we're not doing that. At this point he has everything he needs to succeed. All we can do is hope he does. If not? Well, that's June. :unsure: [/QUOTE]
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He's been kicked out of the shelter
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